Page 20 of Dare To Marry You
I take in a deep breath, and release it slowly, trying to compose myself. “Okay, boys. Turn around.”
In unison, my four older brothers pivot around. Their facial expressions bring out something between a laugh and a sob from me as the men who helped me grow up into the person I am today see me in my wedding dress for the first time.
“You’re stunning, Kat,” Max says, breaking from the line and walking over. “But is that…” His eyes drop down to the ultrasound photo clutched in my trembling hands.
I go to nod, but then Beckett blurts out, “Holy shit. You’re pregnant?” He pulls off his glasses and swipes at his eyes before putting them back on, his eyes bouncing between the ultrasound and my face.
“I’m gonna be that kid’s favourite uncle,” Sawyer proclaims, making us all laugh. But then his arms are wrapped around my shoulder, careful not to mess with my hair or my veil. “I’m so fucking happy for you, Kat.”
“Thank you,” I squeak out, trying not to ruin my makeup on his crisp black jacket. I end up surrounded by my brothers, all of them examining the ultrasound photo, brushing tears off their faces. Seeing these big burly men reduced to absolute mush over their future niece or nephew makes me melt inside.
“Alright, you big softies, time to clean up and get ready for the main event.” Lily claps her hands together, breaking apart our huddle.
When I glance over, my parents have their arms around each other, their faces beaming with love and affection. Heidi and Cam are waiting next to Lily, and I realize there is no one on this earth as lucky as I am to call these people my family.
Mom steps over and fusses with my hair, tears glistening in her own eyes. “Good thing that makeup they used is waterproof, honey, or we’d all be wearing streaks of it down our faces.”
We share a chuckle as she hands me a small mirror so I can see for myself. “It’s kind of a miracle Sawyer didn’t destroy my hair with how hard he was hugging me.” I raise my voice just loud enough for him to hear, and my silly brother doesn’t disappoint.
“Sorry for loving you, Kat. I’ll try to hold back my enthusiasm next time you show up in a wedding dress, holding a picture of your future child in your hands.” Loving sarcasm is dripping from every word, and as expected, we all laugh.
“Love you, Sawyer,” I say in a singsong voice, giving him a wink. “I love all of you. Seriously, I’m a lucky girl to have you four by my side today and every day of my life.” Turning to include my hopefully future sisters-in-law and my parents, I continue, “Thank you for helping me make today absolutely perfect. This baby is going to be so loved. But there’s someone missing right now, and I’d kind of like to go and make him my husband, if that’s alright?”
Chapter ten
Hunter
My heart is pounding so loud, I swear everyone in the car can hear it. My hands are clammy. My stomach is churning, and I can’t blame it on the egg sandwich and coffee I ate today.
All the telltale signs of an impending panic attack.
And I’m fighting it back with every fiber of my being. I’m using every goddamn tool my years of therapy have ever given me, because there’s no room for anxiety right now.
I get to marry Kat Donnelly today.
There is nothing to fear about today.
But as I climb out of Beckett’s car once he parks in front of the red barn that houses my doom — I mean, my future — I repeat those phrases over and over again. I will not let my mental health affect my wedding day.
Beckett’s saying something to me, but I ignore him and just head inside. Audrey and I discussed in our most recent session the power of visual cues and touchpoints to ground me. Maybe if I can see the space, it’ll trigger a calming memory of last night. The rehearsal with just our family was casual, relaxed, fun, and easy.
That coping tactic goes out the window once I get inside and see it’s still set up exactly the same as last night — with only enough chairs for our family.
Fucking shit. Goddamnit, what happened?Everything should be ready by now; people will be arriving in less than half an hour. The tenuous hold I was starting to have over my nerves disappears, but right alongside my panic is anger that Kat’s wedding day is not going to go off without a hitch. Focusing on the anger is a surprisingly helpful distraction from my anxiety, so when a hand on my shoulder has me whirling around, I’m ready to battle against whoever dared screw up my future wife’s perfect day.
But it’s Leo. And he’s more than just Kat’s cousin, he’s my boss. And right now, he’s got an unreadable expression on his face.
“What the hell is going on, Leo? Why isn’t this place ready? Kat’s gonna freak —”
“No, she’s not, everything is ready. Take a breath, Callaghan.”
His commanding tone leaves no room for me to argue, so I do as he says and inhale sharply.
The lift of his eyebrow tells me that’s not what he meant. Not bothering to hide my eye roll, I take another, slightly calmer one this time.
“You ready to listen?”
I nod brusquely.
