Page 56 of At the Highlander's Mercy
‘It is over, Lilidh. Now, come with me.’
He did not wait for her to argue more, he simply took her by the arm and led her out. He kept the pace a quick one so that she would have to concentrate on her path and her leg and not be able to continue to argue with him. A cowardly thing to do, but it was a kindness compared to what he must do next.
They crossed the yard and made their way to the gate where Connor yet stood, unmoved in the time since Rob left him there. Only his eyes betrayed any emotion when he caught sight of Lilidh approaching. Steelinghimself for what he must do, he released her arm a few paces from the gate.
‘Rob. Father. We should speak in private,’ Lilidh began.
‘There is no need for that now, Lilidh. Your father will take you home now,’ he said.
‘But, Rob, we have—’ He knew she would reveal the vows, so he interrupted her and began his descent into the hell his life would be.
‘We have spent memorable hours together, my sweet. I will miss having you to warm my bed,’ he said, adding a coarse laugh to his words. ‘I was happy to oblige a widow’s need for such things, but nothing else can exist for us. Your father understands I accepted what you offered me, but now I must wed as my clan directs. Tyra has waited long enough.’
She gasped and began to sway. ‘Rob, you said—’
‘Well, Laird MacLerie,’ he called out as he pushed her towards Connor, ‘you have your daughter. Where is the gold?’
Lilidh stumbled the few steps until she reached her father. He pulled her close and whispered something to her that Rob could not hear. Then he called to one of his soldiers, who carried a chest forwards. Connor took the chest and tossed it at Rob’s feet.
‘Your gold, Laird Matheson.’
Rob stood frozen as the sound of Lilidh’s soft cries echoed across the yard. Connor led her to the centre of his men and Rob ordered the gates closed. He could not speak to anyone right now or he would begin tobeg for her forgiveness and her love, so he climbed the steps to the top of the wall and watched the MacLeries begin to leave.
* * *
Three hours later, when the midday sun reached high overhead, they were gone.
* * *
At the evening meal that night, one he did not eat, the elders toasted the way he’d handled the MacLerie laird, they toasted their good will and they toasted him as a worthy son to the late laird.
But Rob had never felt more unworthy than he did now—for he had failed once more to stand up as a man to Connor MacLerie. And he’d hurt Lilidh more deeply than she deserved.
* * *
How she got home, she never knew, for one minute she stood in Keppoch Keep thinking of ways to convince her father to accept her vows with Rob and the next she lay in the same chamber where she had slept before her marriage. Lilidh remembered bits and pieces of the journey, but very little after Rob humiliated her again with his easy dismissal of their time together.
Of their love.
Her siblings and cousins visited her to welcome her home throughout the next week. Her father occasionally informed her of letters from the MacGregors, asking after her and about her recovery from the unfortunate incident. Other than that, she could not face him. Twice she’d been a fool to believe Rob’s word and twice he’d humiliated her in front of her father.
Even when she found him watching her expectantly, she could not speak to him. Her mother spent time with her and never mentioned Rob or the time that she’d been at Keppoch...
Or the passion they shared.
Or the love that he swore and then disavowed.
Or the way he’d made her feel whole once and again.
Shaking off her despondency was difficult because he returned to her in her dreams and she woke sobbing in despair or shuddering in pleasure as her body and soul remembered every moment of it. Lilidh became a master of deception in those next weeks—deceiving herself and others that it had mattered not to her.
She spent her days reading or sewing and ignoring the devastation in her heart. She spent her nights dreaming of being back in his arms.
To get away from some of the pitying glances, she began spending time in the village with her cousin Ciara, who was awaiting the birth of her second child. Since she could no longer travel with her father on the laird’s business, Ciara did any work in her home, one built by Ciara’s husband, Tavis.
Ciara was intelligent and had a similar sense of humour as Lilidh had, so it was a wonderful diversion to spend days with her. And it was a chance comment by Ciara, about two weeks after Lilidh’s return to Lairig Dubh, that made her realise her courses had not come.
And that she was carrying Rob’s bairn.
