Page 44 of Promise Me This
The truth is, I’m not sure what I want people to know yet. And the fact that Kia handled it with that kind of instinctive discretion is a relief. Even though it’s not the school’s business, I know better. If they mention a change in household dynamics to the McIntyres or their lawyers, everything could explode in my face.
Instead of dwelling on the situation, I steer the topic in a different direction. “Am I in time for dinner?”
“Yup. We wanted to wait for you,” Kia says, checking the pot boiling away on the stove.
I’m taken aback by her response. Sarah used to eat without me all the time, making it clear that her life didn’t revolve around my schedule.
“Elody helped make everything,” Kia adds when I remain silent. “She was really cheffing it up. Right, El?”
“Is that so?” I ask, turning my attention to my daughter. “Is it possible that culinary school is on the horizon?”
“Being a cooker is fun,” Elody says before glancing at Kia with a grin.
“It definitely is,” Kia replies. “Especially when I have such a good sous chef.”
Something shifts unexpectedly inside me.
Kia turns the pot handles before handing Elody a smaller fork to test the noodles. I lean against the counter, content to watch them.
The easy way she fits into my life should be disconcerting.
So why isn’t it?
Dinner is filled with more stories about school and lots of laughter as Elody splatters sauce all over the place.
Once the plates are cleared away, she runs to the kitchen and grabs a pan from the counter. “Look, Daddy! We made brownies. There’s frosting and sprinkles!”
“Wow! We’re talking total sugar overload.”
Elody giggles before turning to Kia. “You’re staying forever, right?”
My hand pauses midway to my mouth for a drink.
“Well,” Kia says carefully, her gaze bouncing from me to Elody, “I’ll be here for a while.”
“For-ev-er,” Elody declares, stretching out the word.
“Hey.” I lower my voice. “Bug, Kia’s helping us out right now. But that doesn’t mean forever.”
Elody’s face crumples instantly. “Why not?”
I hesitate, caught between honesty and age-appropriate truth. “Because she has her own life,” I say finally. “School. Things she needs to figure out.”
Kia rubs slow, soothing circles on Elody’s back. “That doesn’t mean I’m disappearing. I promise I’ll tell you when it’s time for me to go.”
Elody sniffles as she considers this.
I glance over just in time to catch a flicker of emotion cross Kia’s face. Guilt, maybe? Longing too. It’s gone before I can pin it down, leaving me with the uneasy sense that this conversation was probably difficult for both of us.
With a nod, Elody goes back to eating her brownie like she didn’t just hit every exposed nerve I have.
Later, while Kia helps Elody with her pajamas, I load the dishwasher. It should be a relief that this arrangement is working. The schedule. The help. The stability. It’s everything my lawyer said I need to show the court.
Instead, all I can think about is the way my daughter’s face lights up when she stares at the pretty blonde. The way Elody leaned into her at the table. Or the way my own rhythm has started to sync with the sounds in this penthouse that weren’t there before. Kia’s quiet laugh, her footsteps in the hall, the clink of her mug in the sink.
This is what I always wanted as a kid. A place that felt full instead of echoing. I thought I’d built it once. Instead, it turned out I was wrong.
Footsteps scamper down the hall, Elody’s voice reaching me before she does. “Daddy, Kia says we can play Go Fish!”
