Page 101 of In My Heart
“I can do it right now if it would make you feel better,” he teased with a waggle of his eyebrows.
“Can I do it? Take your clothes off, I mean?” I asked shyly.
“You can,” he nodded. “Are you sure you feel alright now?”
“I’m sure. Sorry I freaked out.”
“No. No apologies. Next time you start to feel that way, I want you to tell me, or simply say ‘stop’ so that we can talk, okay? This is new for both of us and It’s okay if we have to stop and adjust along the way.”
“Okay,” I agreed. Cal leaned in to kiss me briefly, then set me down on my feet before him again.
I looked up at him, unsure what to do next. Was he going to tell me and take back his control, or had I ruined the moment?
“You wanted to strip me, babe,” he reminded me gently as he ran a soothing hand over my head and down my hair. “Kneel and take off my pants if you still want that.”
“I do,” I smiled as I sank to my knees before him and reached up for the waistband of his sweatpants.
I pulled them down and found him naked beneath them, which was somewhat of a surprise. I had expected him to sleep in boxers, but clearly not. I only stuttered for a moment as his trousers caught on his sizeable erection, butI forced myself to stay focused and got his pants down to his ankles. He stepped out of them one foot at a time and I grabbed them to toss them out of the way.
Since that was all he was wearing, that was the end of my undressing him and I sat frozen for a moment, my eyes staring right at his erection.
“Cara?” A hand appeared beside me – an offer of help to stand, but I looked up to him instead.
“C-can I touch you?” I asked nervously. He looked a little pained as he thought it through for a moment.
“Just for a moment. I have plans that don’t involve me coming already,” he eventually gave in. “Take me in your hand and you can explore a little, but keep your touch gentle.”
I reached up and wrapped my hand around his length. It was long and wide. My fingers couldn’t completely engulf it. I moved my hand up and down, then glanced to Cal. I had done this before, but trauma had blocked out a lot of the specific details of those forced times.
“That’s good, babe,” he breathed as his eyes met mine. He was breathing harder now.
I moved my hand up and down more, loving the deep sighs and small moans that slipped from Cal the more I touched him. His jaw was tight, his eyes closed, like he was lost in what I was doing to him.
I ran my thumb over the line at the top and Cal moaned loudly, then looked down at me as I did it again, then moved my hand up and down.
“Okay, enough now!” he ground out as he reached down and grabbed me under my arms, pulling me up.
“Did I hurt you?” I asked, shocked.
“No, Cara. Quite the opposite. I needed you to stop before I came embarrassingly fast in your hand,” he told me, frankly.
“Oh,” I nodded as it made sense to me. “Okay, but can I…another time? I liked it.”
“Definitely another time,” he agreed easily.
He laid me back in the centre of the bed, kneeling on it beside my feet and studying me laid out before him once again.
“It’s my turn to play now. I want you to reach up and hold onto the pillow above you. Can you reach?” he asked as I did exactly that, grabbing the pillow and wrapping my hands around the top of it. “That’s right. Good girl. You’re to keep your hands right there and your eyes on mine the whole time, understand?”
“What if I don’t?” I asked almost teasingly.
“Then I’ll stop, and believe me, you won’t want me to stop.”
I didn’t even have the chance to come up with any smart ass remark as Cal pushed apart my raised knees without any warning or fanfare. When I tensed up and kept my legs open only a little he looked to me.
“Let your knees drop to the bed for me, beautiful. I can’t make you feel good if I can’t touch you,” he told me with a note of firmness. “Just relax. There’s no embarrassmentin this room right now, not between us, not when we’re having sex. I intend to know every inch of you eventually.”
“I don’t think you can say things like that,” I groaned.
