Page 27 of Surrendering to her Highland Captor
She tugged on the thin leather strap as she spoke, but James didn’t let go.
“Nay, Taryn. This does nae work like that.”
Sighing, she let go and let her hands fall to the tops of her legs. James kicked the horse into a walk and turned him south. In less than five minutes, she was already regretting her decision to ride in the front. The way his arms settled around hers, his chest pressed against her back, she felt confined and held all at once. Her head and heart hardly knew what to make of it all. Even worse, his touch distracted her from her purpose of getting answers out of him.
“Why will ye nae tell me where ye are taking me? Do I nae have a right to know what my future holds?”
He grunted.
“I have already told ye I will nae try to run, and I meant it,” she lied. “Please, just tell me; are we going back to Laird McGregor?”
James stayed silent.
“Ye cannae mean that ye are delivering me to that vile man my parents promised me to? James, he will kill me. Does that nae matter to ye?”
She watched as his knuckles turned white around the reins. Thick veins protruded from the back of his hands, pulsing inanger. Why, she didn’t know. She was the one taken captive, being pushed around, and having her life threatened.
The silence stretched between them as they rode through the ragged beauty of the Highlands, Taryn had gotten so familiar with. Snow crunched under the horse’s hooves as they passed trees coated with a white layer. It was a blend of white and brown that Taryn loved. The only sight of green came from the evergreen trees and bushes they walked by every once in a while. To her, it looked like the world was getting wiped clean, given a fresh slate. She wished the snow could do the same for her.
As it was, the only thing the snow was good for right now was soaking through the top layers of her dress until her bones were cold. She had left the castle with only her gloves and her bag on her. She was grateful that, at the very least, she had her good boots on; otherwise, she would be arriving without all her toes still attached.
She shivered as a fresh piece of snow-soaked hair brushed across her back. Ever so inconspicuously, James shifted, acting as though he needed to readjust to find comfort once more, but Taryn couldn’t help but notice that his new position had him closer, his chest warming her back.
She was torn. So far, she had been met with nothing but cold indifference from James. Aila had taught her to play whatever part was necessary to survive, particularly when it came to kidnappers. She doubted that Aila ever suspected that Taryn would know her captor, but it had been a lifetime ago that she and James had been friends. He had seen her as a helpless, spoiled young girl, incapable of anything.
While her pride bristled at the idea of pretending to be so feeble and helpless again, she wondered if that was the only way to get him to lower his guard. From the way he pressed into her, warding off the cold, it was clear that he hadn’t lost all of his good manners.
I have to get him to talk. I have to show him that he can still trust me, nay matter how much I have changed.
The longer she thought about it, the more damp her hair became, and the further away from the Kincaid Castle they got, the more determined she was to get answers out of James. She needed time to prepare herself for what might lie ahead, and the only way to do that was to know where they were headed.
When midday passed, and he showed no signs of stopping or slowing, Taryn knew it was time to put her plan into action. If only to garner some sympathy for herself so that she could be just a bit more comfortable. Her legs were all but numb, her stomach rumbling from emptiness, and her bladder more than full. She supposed that the worst that could happen was he would continue to ignore her.
“I ken ye think that growing up, I had it all,” she started slowly. “But the truth is, I was always so lonely. My mother expected me to be perfect. My father expected me to be invisible until he needed something from me. I was nae allowed to play or explore. I was made to sit on a sofa and stab myself with an embroidery needle over and over again, all in the name of becoming a lady.”
James, as expected, didn’t say a work, nor did he try to stop her from rambling on, so she continued.
“I dinnae suppose ye are going to tell me how my parents are?” A beat of silence. “Nay, I did nae think so. I doubt they miss me much. They were never ones for familial affection. In fact, the first time I saw what a family should be was the day I first walked into yer parents’ store. I was so mesmerized by all the colors of the fabrics that it took me entirely too long to notice the way yer mother always made sure Laura was taken care of. Or the way yer father kept such a keen eye on yer mother. By the time I did see it, I could nae focus on anything else. I had never seen a family care for each other so openly.”
She sighed, lost in the memory of it all that she wasn’t sure she cared much if James would answer her.
“I did nae, however, miss the moment ye stepped into the shop. Ye were dirty and tired from training, but yer proud smile beamed through the room. Ye seemed larger than life to me then… Ye still do. A man like ye did nae fit into my understanding of the world. Until ye, men were either like my father, demanding and cold, or my uncle, quiet and permissive. But somehow, ye managed to be unlike either of them in any way.”
Had they been face to face, Taryn would never have admitted such truths. But with her back to him, she felt strangely free to confess herself.
“Ye were the first person to make me feel safe. That must sound so odd, but I always kent my parents would one day sell me to the highest bidder. Even Laura, at the start, could only see me as the Laird’s heir. But ye, ye never treated me any differently than ye did Laura. I was just another young lass underfoot.”
“That is nae true.”
Her breath caught at his gruff response. But judging from how quietly he spoke it, she knew he wasn’t ready to be pressed for more of a conversation. That suited her fine. She merely carried on walking down the bittersweet path of memory lane.
“First, it seemed as though ye could nae get away from us quick enough. Ye were always so busy with yer training, always carrying that sword with ye everywhere ye went. Then something changed, I am nae sure what, and ye started to teach us the things ye were learning.” She laughed softly to herself as she recalled the first time she sparred with Aila to show her the small list of self-defense skills she had acquired, all of which came from James. “I still use so much of what ye taught me. It has helped me survive on more than one occasion.”
“I only showed ye to get ye to stop begging.”
“I did nae beg,” she scoffed, her attempt at getting him to talk momentarily forgotten.
“Och, aye ye did,” he countered, sounding more like himself by the second. “Laura somehow managed to convince ye to sneak around the village, following me on my patrols, until I agreed to show ye how to…”
