Page 10 of The List
Addison blew out a heavy breath but refrained from rolling her eyes. Her sister’s concern didn’t deserve that. The root of this stemmed from Hannah being worried about Addison’s well-being and mental health. It was what a sistershoulddo.It’s what I would do if the roles were reversed.
“Hear me out.” Hannah lifted her brows, waiting.
Where was the harm? After all, Hannah had spent the last week trying to get her to stay. What was another speech from her big sister? All the others hadn’t convinced her, and neither would this one. Addison gave a curt nod, crossed the small room, pushed the suitcase aside, and sat next to her sister.
“Alright, I’m listening.”
Hannah licked her lips, straightened her shoulders, and lifted her chin. She was showing all the characteristics of a well-thought-out, possibly rehearsed, speech.I’d expect nothing less.Addison flattened her lips, keeping her smile at bay.
“I think this is a mistake, and you shouldn’t go.”
Addison’s composure slipped, and she snorted. “Yeah, I got that part loud and clear.”
Hannah knitted her brows. “You’ve met her, Addy, through letters. Wrote to her, and now you two are even talking. What more do you need? I’m assuming you’ve expressed your gratitude, right? So, what’s left?” Hannah paused, and before Addison could offer any rebuttal, her sister cut her off. “I know you’re strong. You’ve proven that, especially in the last few years. But you’re not invincible, Addy.”
This conversation had taken a turn she hadn’t expected. Where was this coming from?
“What?” Addison hiked her brows, chuckling. “You think I’m going to do something reckless?”
Hannah narrowed her gaze. “Don’t look at me like I’m crazy and making this shit up. It’s been an ongoing pattern with you for the last eight months.” She jerked her head mockingly. “Skydiving?”
Ah hell.Addison was now aware of where this was going.And I don’t like it.Mainly, because she wasn’t prepared to refute her sister’s claim. How could she?It was true.Instead, she opted to wing it.
Addison shrugged. “Lots of people skydive.”
Hannah shook her head incessantly and scooted closer, bumping her knee against Addison’s. “Not those who are deathly afraid of heights. Just like people who cry at the sight of needlesdon’tget tattoos.”
Most don’t.
Addison was slowly getting backed into a corner and was desperate for some space. She stood, walked over to her dresser, then turned to face Hannah, tucking her hands behind her back. “I’ve evolved. Overcame my fears. That’s a good thing, Hannah.”
Hannah scoffed. “Yeah, it is. When you do it for yourself. But when you do it for someone else, that puts those acts in a different category.”
The idea of getting a tattoo had never crossed her mind in all of her thirty years on earth. She appreciated the symbolism, enjoyed looking at her friends’ latest addition to their body art, but it wasn’t something she wanted for herself. Addison had intended on remaining a blank canvas for life. And jumping out of a plane? She could barely watch videos of other people doing it without getting anxious.Who the hell voluntarily jumps out with just a little parachute and a prayer?
Me.
“Those are thingshewanted to do. Not you!”
This was the elephant in the room. Addison had never spoken about what she was doing. She hadn’t told a soul about Cleo’s letter and her own questions. It was by chance her sister saw it hanging on her fridge and asked about it. At the time, Addison had played it off as simple curiosity. Knox died at thirty-two. She was sure there were things he’d wanted to do and never got the chance. When she’d initially asked Cleo, she’d posed it as a hypothetical. There were only six things on the list. As of now, she’d completed all but two.
“You have his heart, Addy.” Hannah clasped her hands on her lap. “But you’re in no way obligated to live his life.”
Aren’t I, though?She had a second chance at life, but it came at a heavy price—his death. Was it unreasonable to live a little for him? Addison was eternally grateful for what he’d given her, and if she could fulfill his heart’s desires—even if his heart now lived in her chest—shouldn’t she?
“I owe him.”
Hannah shook her head. “No, you don’t.”
Addison was growing increasingly angry. She understood what her sister was saying. But there was a lack of understanding on Hannah’s part. She had no idea what it was like for Addison. The emotions, the guilt that weighed her down. She pressed a hand over her heart.Our heart.
“He gave me his heart.”
Hannah shot up from the bed. “He didn’tgive youanything. He died, and you were a match. Luck, fate? Whatever you want to call it. He didn’t lay down his life for yours. Stop trying to repay him.” She arched her brow. “And his sister.”
Having a full blowout fight with her sister hours before her flight was not what she’d planned.And I won’t allow it.
“I’m not trying to repay him. Or Cleo. Because I can’t. No matter what I do, it would never be enough, Hannah. How do you even start to repay someone who gave you their heart?”
