Page 141 of This Bitter Sweet Temptation
There are a million reasons why we don’t make sense.
But this feels so right, I can’t believe it’s not meant to be.
It also feels fragile, this quiet peace we’ve carved for ourselves. Like if we make one wrong move, it’ll all come crashing down on our heads.
The truth is, I’m scared of that happening.
I’m afraid to let go when we’ve just barely begun to hold on.
“No need to decide anything right now,” I whisper, and he’s still watching me intently, that desert night back in his eyes. I can’t believe I get to call him mine, even if it’s just for now. “What we are. What this is. Where we go from here.”
“What brought this on?” His eyes search mine.
“Anxiety, of course. The story of my life. I don’t want anything to change. Not yet,” I whisper.
He reaches up and drags his thumb down my bottom lip. The rush of heat through my body feels incendiary.
“What makes you think it’ll change so fast?”
“Because. You’re the kind of guy who likes to make things happen. You don’t dillydally once a decision gets made.”
“And that’s bad?” He drops his hand. I already miss his touch.
Ridiculous.
“It’s okay to just chill in the moment, you know.” I force a smile. “Just breathe, big guy. Enjoy life without overthinking.”
“I don’t overthink.” Amusement flashes behind his pointed frown. It’s all in the twitch of his lips, the warmth in his eyes.
“Daaad!” Kit calls, and we both look over. “Dad, Cleo, come look!” She’s pointing at a rocky tower offshore where a group of puffins are nesting.
Holden doesn’t answer, but he does offer a hand to me when Kit turns back toward the birds.
A silent acceptance that stops my heart.
God, I should follow my own advice.
Live, chill, breathe.
Exist and enjoy.
Just hope nothing changes before I’ve figured out how to stop myself from falling all the way down to rock bottom.
That night,Dad calls. Long overdue.
I’m sitting in bed in the guest room—the one across the hall I haven’t spent more than a few hours in since I arrived, mostly for appearances.
“Hey, Dad,” I say, steeling myself.
“I’m surprised you’re not home yet,” he growls. “I heard Uncle Leo’s old place got broken into. Elvira said Ethan was scoping it out. Why didn’t you tell me?”
The man doesn’t miss a beat.
I roll my eyes.
“News travels fast. No need to worry, it wasn’t a huge deal. The bad guys were pretty skittish and they ran off the second Holden went after them. Props to Gramps for leaving me a bodyguard,” I lie. “Let me guess, Elvira hyped it up? You know how she is.”
“I knowsomeone’s telling me what’s going on with this bullshit, Cleo.” His voice cuts deep.
