Page 4 of Stuck with You
“It… it was nice to see you, Corrie,” Gabbie offers with sad eyes. I know she suspects that I might be lying.
Likewise, Kayla gives me a long hug goodbye — nothing gets past her. “Let’s get together soon… just you and me.”
“Sure… I’d like that.”
I gather my things and wave goodbye as I head toward the door. I hate doing this to Maeve, but I’m sure she has no desire to see me cry because she gets to have a baby and I don’t. Just as expected, as soon as I step out of the café, I fall into sobs.
* * *
Today’s rants:
Where the hell was I when God was handing out juicy fertile wombs? Sure, I have great legs, but I’d give them away in a minute for a baby.
Why must we age? Every single second of every single day, we are dying. Why can’t we start off as old bats, and slowly un-age, Benjamin Button style, until we are clueless babies, and eventually embryos, and microscopic zygotes.
What is the point of life? Seriously! What is it?! I’d love to know.
Abby and Baxterare staring at me again. They’re concerned, very concerned. I’ve been curled up on the sofa, crying for a day. I just can’t get over it. I feel hopeless… pointless.
“What is the point, guys?! I don’t have a job, I don’t have a family. All I have is a fabulous shoe collection, and you two.”
Abby cocks her head, and Baxter shoots me a look, like I’ve offended him.
“I mean… not that you’re not both insanely adorable and fabulous,” I attempt to backtrack. “But let’s face it, you’re not babies.”
I sigh and stretch out on the sofa, wondering how I can possibly make myself feel better. I just need to take the focus off this. I need a change of scenery. Perhaps a trip away would do me good.
But I hate traveling alone. I hate airports and all the hoops you need to jump through. Jacob was always the one in charge, wielding the boarding passes and the passports. I’d follow him like a little puppy, oblivious. To travel alone seems daunting.
Just as I’m about to fall into another crying fit, an idea hits me. I suddenly remember my friends, Beatrice and James, and their lovely little beach cottage. Jacob and I have been there a few times, and it was so invigorating. Beatrice told me that we were welcome to it anytime if they weren’t using it. It’s early June and beautiful out, and their kids are still in school. The place is probably sitting empty.
I hop off the sofa and go on a quest to find my phone.
