Page 40 of To Have and to Stalk
Insane as it was, there was something about him that made me feel safe enough to be reckless.
“Okay, so…” Lithie leaned forward. “How was it?”
“It was…”
Amazing.
I didn’t know it could be like that. Unhinged and feral and passionate and sosafe.Was that how it was supposed to be?
And we didn’t even have sex.
“Good,” I said.
Lithie’s face fell, and she tilted her head, like,Are you fucking kidding me?
“Good,” Olly deadpanned. “She drops a nuclear bomb on us and we getgood.”
“But you didn’t fuck?” Eames asked.
I shook my head, reaching for a jalapeño popper—I hated jalapeño, but I needed something to do with my hands.
“She’s lying,” Olly announced. “There’s more.”
“I swear togod,Shay—” my sister started.
I cut her off. “He put me on top of a coffin, and there may have been a knife involved.”
Another stunned silence fell.
My sister rubbed her eye, sighing. “This is fully what happens when you try to shove a kinky bitch into a prude.”
“I’m not a prude.”
“Obviously!” she said.
Another silence, then Olly asked, “Was the knife sanitized?”
I laughed, remembering my same fear. “Uh. Yeah.”
“This is wild,” Olly said. “I love these books, but I couldn’t imagine doing that in real life. Like one time a guy tried to tell me what to wear and I nearly throat punched him.”
“It wasn’t like that,” I said. “It was…” I didn’t know how to explain it, because it didn’t fully make sense to me either. He’d spent the month asking me everything under the sun, learning my wants and dislikes, but more than that helistened.
Void had even sensed when I was starting to perform. He’d made me stop. He could have easily sat there and watched, gotten off, but it was like it was all forme. Everything. I’d never felt so fully taken care of.
He didn’tcontrolme.
He dominated.
“But you didn’t sleep together?” Eames asked again, incredulous.
I shrugged. “I guess I got in my head.”
“I need to know at what point you got in your head,” Lithie said. “Was it before the knife or after?”
I glared. “Funny.”
“No, because at no point were you in your head about running through a graveyard with a man who may or may not kill you. Are you going to see him again?”
