Page 34 of My Demon Neighbor
She gave me a soft smile, her blue eyes peering into me. "You like him, don't you?"
I fumbled the eggs, almost dropping the carton. Nessa caught it just in time, then carefully placed it on the counterbefore giving me her full attention and waiting patiently as I tried not to panic.
I knew from the way she'd said it that she didn't mean 'You like him as a friend,' and that... I didn't know what to do with that. I'd avoided thinking of Pythor in that context since the moment we first met because it was safer.
Trusting Pythor as a friend was one thing, but anything more?
"Hey, I didn't mean to make you anxious. You don't have to like him, Codie. If a friend is all you feel comfortable being, then that's okay," she murmured, squeezing my forearm.
I nodded mutely, then sighed. She was the only one I could talk to this about—I certainly couldn't talk to Pythor, at least not until I'd made sense of my tumultuous thoughts—and there was no point in keeping my feelings a secret from her.
"I'm scared," I admitted, and she stepped closer, allowing me to lean my shoulder against hers as we leaned against the counter side by side. It felt easier to talk without looking at her.
"Of Pythor?"
I shook my head quickly, a smile quirking my lips without conscious thought. "For some strange reason,"—maybe because he's my fated mate—"he doesn't scare me at all. Hasn't since the first time we talked. I mean, he's exactly the kind of man—build-wise, I mean—that I'd be terrified of if I came across him on the street, but Pythor... he always makes me feel safe. No, not just safe. Protected. Like he'd fight off anyone who tried to hurt me."
"He does have that bodyguard vibe going, especially when it comes to you," she mused, and I wondered what she meant by that. She'd only seen us together twice, and that was during the self-defense classes, where she'd had to leave early the first time.
I shrugged, unsurewhat to say to that, and she blew out a soft breath.
"Codie, I'm not gonna push you. If you're not ready for a relationship, you don't have to do anything. No one can dictate what you should do except yourself. You said you're scared, but not of Pythor. Then what?"
I pursed my lips, struggling to put it into words.
"I... I guess I'm scared of what comes after."
"After?"
I nodded, then stared at the floor, a little embarrassed to admit it even though I knew I shouldn't be. It wasn't my fault. It wasn't.
Checking to make sure Alia wasn't around—Hella seemed to be keeping her company, since she was also nowhere to be seen—I said, "I don't—I don't know if I would ever feel comfortable,"—safe—"having sex with someone, even Pythor. It's kind of expected in a relationship, though, isn't it? What if he gets bored of me, or tired of waiting?"
What if it damaged our mate bond and the friendship we'd built, and I lost everything?
Nessa was quiet for a long moment, and I imagined she was trying to find the words to console me because she knew I was right.
"Does Pythor care about you? Actually care about you?" she asked, and I didn't even have to think about it.
"He does."
She glanced over at me, a smile on her lips. "Have you told him? About what happened?"
I shook my head. "He knows that someone hurt me. And I said I didn't want a relationship, so I thinkhe has an idea."
Nessa nodded. "Okay. Then knowing what you know about him, do you think he's the type to pressure you, or push you before you're ready for more?"
"No way!"
"Is he a patient guy?"
I thought about how he'd played catch with me, how he walked around the community with me, how he'd stood at the gates for ten whole minutes while I tried to gather up the courage to step out before giving up, and how he'd never once seemed like he would rather be elsewhere.
"Yeah."
"Do you think he likes you?"
I blinked, thinking about how Pythor had explained his sexuality to me. "I think there's... a chance."
