Page 90 of Secrets and Lies
“And that’s exactly why I’m not good company right now.” He plants his hands on his thighs and pushes himself up. “I should go.”
“Sit.” My tone is firm but quiet, and I bite back my grin when he immediately drops back down on the couch.
“What will help?” I ask. “Do you want to just be in the same space as someone, or do you need to be distracted?”
“Both.” He smiles sadly. “But I think existing is the better option right now.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah. I just need to process some stuff, then I’ll be a human who can human again.”
“How about I get back to what I was working on and you make yourself comfortable while you process.” I point to my computer. “I’ll just be over there.”
“Yeah, okay.” He worries his bottom lip between his teeth a few times. “Are you sure I won’t bother you? I brought my earbuds, but?—”
“It’s fine,” I reach over and pat his thigh. “This is the first year I’ve had my own room at school since I was fourteen. I can exist with someone in my space without them bothering me.”
He smiles shyly. “Thanks.”
I pat his thigh again, then give it a little squeeze as I stand. I can feel his eyes on me as I walk to my desk, but I don’t bother looking behind me as I sit and wiggle my mouse to wake up my computer.
15
ANTHONY
A few momentsof silence pass, then West says something I can’t make out as his phone starts vibrating over and over again, like it’s caught in some sort of loop. Finally, the mechanical sound stops, and he mutters something that sounds a lot like “Fuck my fucking life.”
I spend the next ten or so minutes doing little tweaks on the file I was working on that don’t require a lot of my attention while West sits on my couch, his attention fixed on his phone.
I can see him out of the corner of my eye when I swing my chair to the left, and he seems to be in a different position every time I check to see what he’s up to.
One minute he’s sitting with both feet on the floor with his arms tucked into his sides. The next time I look, he’s got one foot up on the couch, and his chin is resting on his knee as he balances his phone on his other leg. A minute later he’s sitting cross-legged and hunched over, and the next time I look, he’s switched so the soles of his feet are pressed together and he’s in a butterfly pose.
And it’s not just him moving around that keeps grabbing my attention, it’s also the litany of sounds he’s making as hedoes whatever he’s up to. The heavy sighs and little grunts and groans of frustration are almost as distracting as his nonsensical exclamations, and it’s obvious he’s getting more and more worked up the longer he’s on his phone.
“For fuck’s sake,” he grinds out and stabs at the screen with his finger. “Fuck all the way off.”
The phone vibrates again, and he lets out a frustrated growl. “Fuck this.” He tosses his phone on the other side of the couch, and it starts vibrating again before it’s even stopped bouncing. “I’m not fucking dealing with this.”
“You okay?” I ask when he buries his face in his hands and groans loudly.
“Yes, but no.” He drops his hands and blows out a frustrated sigh. “I’m not looking at my phone again for at least a week. Everyone can just fuck right off.”
“That bad?”
“I swear every person I’ve ever talked to on campus is texting and asking about the breakup. And my brother is being an even bigger dick than usual, and I just can’t deal with any of this right now.”
“Your brother is being a dick?”
“A bigger one than usual,” he corrects.
“Which brother?”
West’s two older brothers—and his father—are famous in Keeper lore for all the records they hold and the accolades they have, but he never talks about them.
“Tyler.” He shoots me a wry smile. “Greg was being a dick earlier, so I guess it’s Ty’s turn.”
“What are they being dicks about?”
