Page 134 of Secrets and Lies
He could pretty much ask for anything right now, and I’d give it to him without a second thought if it meant I got to have both versions of him.
“We’re exclusive for as long as this goes on.”
I freeze as my brain does the mental equivalent of a record scratch. I’m not sure what I was expecting him to say, but that sure as fuck wasn’t it.
“You want to be exclusive?” I ask when I find my voice again. I need him to be specific because I don’t want to read into things that aren’t there.
“Yes.” His tone is as serious as his expression. “This doesn’t have to mean anything, but I don’t share. We’re exclusive for as long as it goes on, and if I find out you let someone touch you, or you even thought about touching someone else while we’re doing this, I will destroy both of you. I don’t give a fuck who they are. And I won’t stop until your entire worlds are shattered and you’re left to pick up the pieces of whatever is left.”
Just like in the hall earlier, he didn’t raise his voice or even add any sort of threatening inflection to his words. He’s stating facts and telling me exactly what will happen if I betray him, and that’s a thousand times more terrifying than if he were ranting and making idle threats out of anger.
“Do we have an understanding?”
I nod and try to temper my smile, but it probably looks as big and as goofy as it feels.
I know it doesn’t mean anything, but him not wanting to be with anyone else while we’re doing this makes me stupidly happy, and all that possessive talk was way hotter than it has any business being.
Do I have a possessiveness kink on top of all the other ones I’m discovering?
“I’m glad we’re on the same page.” He presses his leg against mine. “And I’m fine with keeping this quiet if that’s what you want.”
“That’s not what you want?”
He shrugs. “I don’t really care either way.”
“You wouldn’t care if people knew you’re into guys?”
“Why would I give a shit about that?” He looks genuinely confused. “I don’t give a fuck what they do in the bedroom. Why are they concerning themselves with what I do in mine?”
“What if people knew you were hooking up with me?” I ask softly.
His expression darkens. “If anyone is stupid enough to have an opinion about who I choose to sleep with, then they’ll find out what happens when you fuck with me and mine.”
A thrill races through me. Yup, I definitely have a possessive kink. And even though I know it’s just a “You’re mine” because we’re sleeping together and he doesn’t share kind of “Mine,” I like hearing him say it, and that’s not good.
I’ve never been one of those people who can separate sex from emotion, but at this point, it doesn’t really matter. I’ve been infatuated with Ant for years, so I’m once again jumping into this with feelings when he’s just looking for some fun.
As long as I can remember that, I should be fine.
“Does your family know?” I ask, pushing those thoughts out of my head. “About you being into guys?”
He rests his hand on my ankle and gives it a gentle squeeze. “I told them when I was fourteen.”
“Were they okay with it?” I ask tentatively.
He nods. “They’ve always been really open about that kind of thing. My mom always used to add ‘or a boyfriend’ when she’d talk about me dating and having a girlfriend, so I knew she didn’t have any expectations about my sexuality long before I told her.And my dad came out to me when I told him, so he obviously didn’t have any issues with it, either.”
“I’m sorry, what?” I gape at him like a moron.
He laughs. “You should see your face right now.”
“Sorry,” I huff out an embarrassed laugh and shake off my shock. “That was just the last thing I expected you to say.” I pause. “So your dad is…”
“He’s bi,” he says. “He’s not really out anymore, but that’s mostly because my parents have been together for almost thirty years, so even the people who know don’t really think about it anymore.”
“And he was out before they got married?”
He nods.
