Page 103 of Knox Academy Omnibus
I take my stuff to my room and get changed into a Christmas themed summer dress and braid my hair. The humidity at this time of year sends my curly hair into frizz overload, so it’s easier to keep it up at all times.
“Hey,” Smalls says from my door. “Are you okay?”
I nod. “We need to talk,” I tell him. He steps into my room and shuts the door, taking a seat on the bed beside me.
“I thought we might.” He sighs. “Is everything okay?”
“We’re still best friends...right?”
“Forever, you know that.” He reaches over and takes my hand in his huge paw, patting it reassuringly.
“I’m not going back,” I say carefully, gauging his reaction. He doesn’t say anything.
“I can’t. I failed without you and Aadi to protect me. I did some things, things I can’t take back.”
“Okay…” he says slowly, drawing the ‘a’ out forever. “Does your dad know?” I shake my head.
“I’ll tell them after Christmas,” I vow. “But that isn’t how I messed up. Promise you won’t hate me?”
“Hey,” he says, throwing his large arm around me, pulling me into his side. He lightly kisses my temple and as I gaze up at him, I feel warmth spread from my stomach outwards. Smalls is home. Safety. Familiarity. Everything I know and love. My lips part as he looks at me in the same way and we move towards each other. There’s a pull, but it’s not magnetic or burning. More a call for comfort. Our lips touch, and I sigh. Smalls is my everything, but it just doesn’t feel like it did.
We pull apart, and I rest my forehead into the crook of his neck. I take a deep breath of his cologne – Joop – which I have told him numerous times screams ‘drug dealer’ but he always just laughs. It fills my nose, and for once, it calms my nerves.
“I slept with my stepbrothers.” I feel his body go stiff.
“Plural?”
“Yeah, all four of them. I thought they liked me.” I laugh at myself, that sounds so cliché. “But it was all some stupid game to them, so I kinda did something to ensure they never want me back.” That makes him laugh.
“What did you do?”
“With the help of a good friend, I broke into the stepdaddy’s safe and stole the students’ files, had them copied, and pasted all their crimes onto the walls of the school. The number one rule at Knox Academy is to not ask others why they are there.”
“So you exposed them?” Smalls asks. He sounds angry, but not at me.
“The whole school,” I admit. He hisses out a breath.
“I hate to say it,” he hesitates, probably not wanting to piss me off at Christmas. “But exposing everyone was a really shitty thing to do.”
“I know, but I needed to ensure that the school wouldn’t take me back. There is no way that can be overlooked, they’ll have no choice but to expel me.”
“Let's forget this for now and go gang up on Aadi with the water guns.”
I don’t miss the fact that he didn’t comment on me sleeping with the guys. I wanted him to yell or have an opinion or something. Him not saying anything hurts. I went away for a couple of months and everything has changed. I’ve tried to ignore it over the last few weeks, tried to focus on enjoying being at home. I just don’t think it’s them who have changed, it’s me.
I’m not the same girl from the courtroom. Yes, I did something stupid to get out of Knox Academy, just like I always do, but something about me has changed and I’m not sure I like it.
I forgot how much I missed my friends. Most of our gang come from shitty home lives; drugs, alcohol and violence are all common family issues here. Aadi, Smalls and I are lucky because we have a functional family, even if it’s not traditional.
Dad is at the BBQ drinking a beer, chatting away to his best friend Mike – Uncle Mike to me. Chelsea and one of her friends are rounding up the younger children from playing under the sprinkler to go get some food.
Smalls seems to be avoiding me. Uncle Mike’s teenage daughter Bella is trying to teach Aadi how to use the app, ‘Musically’. Everyone is having an amazing time.
“Hi.” Sarah sits down next to me. She was new to the group when I left, so I haven’t really had time to get to know her. I would be lying if I said watching her interact with all the guyshasn’t made the green-eyed monster want to come out to play. Yes, I’m jealous; I feel replaced. But jealousy aside, I just don’t like her.
“Hey, enjoying your day?” I ask, taking a sip of my Corona. I’m not usually a beer drinker, but on hot ass days like today, a Corona with lime hits the spot. It’s the only thing that does.
“I am, we haven't celebrated Christmas in years. It means a lot to be invited.”
