Page 107 of Knox Academy Omnibus
“Because she’s also my stepsister and right now she’s hurting. She just found out that the people she loves most in the world lied to her,” Sawyer bites back.
“Hypocrite, much?” I grumble under my breath.
He’s refusing to be intimidated by Smalls, and I respect him for that. I could’ve lived without the reminder that they also betrayed me though. The tension rockets up as Smalls and Sawyer get into a pissing contest with one another, each refusing to blink or look away until my father breaks the tension.
“C’mere, Amelie,” Dad says, holding out his arms. I hesitate for a second before launching myself into his embrace. Yes, he lied to me, but for my own good. And he’s my dad.
“Can I come back during the holidays?” I ask Sawyer, already fearing the answer.
“I’m sorry, Amelie, I really am. Take a few days, please,” he begs.
“Bye, Dad, I love you,” I whisper, reaching up on tiptoes to kiss his cheek. “I’m going to miss you so much.”
“Babygirl, I’m proud of you,” he tells me.
“You’re proud of me being a killer?” I scoff, close to losing it.
“I’m proud of the person you’ve become. You may not have been at that school long, but I can see how much you’ve changed – we all can – and I’m proud of the woman you’re becoming.”
I sniff back a sob and wipe the tears from my eyes.
“I love you, Dad.”
“You too, pumpkin,” he tells me, hugging me close and ruffling my hair like he used to when I was a kid.
It’s petty, maybe, but I refuse to speak or even look at Aadi and Smalls. Fuck them.
I leave the room and head upstairs to pack my bag. Looking around, I wonder what I should take with me this time? What do I need? I left everything behind, so I’m sure it will be there waiting for me when I get back to Knox Academy. I look around my room and realise that I’ve not really beenlivinghere either. I didn’t make my dorm at Knox a home, and although my room here has posters on the walls and more personal belongings, as I look around the room, I realise that I don’t want to take them with me either. It’s time to start afresh.
I shove a couple of hoodies in my backpack, remembering how cold it is over there. I pick up my Christmas gifts from the guys and my family. And then I cross to my jewellery box. I don’t have a lot – we’re not a foolish family, we wouldn’t waste precious food money on trinkets and jewels – but I do have one sentimental item I want to take with me now that I know I really won't be returning any time soon.
I reach into the small wooden box and pull out a necklace. It’s a Celtic knot, kind of similar to the Knox boys’ tattoos I realise with a jolt. I don’t know where I got the necklace, it’s always just sort of beenthere. But now I want to wear it for some reason. Iundo the clasp, reach up and re-fasten it around my neck. Then I tuck it inside my top so that it’s unnoticeable.
One last glance around the room and I realise I’m ready to go. I’m not exactly looking forward to having to return to Knox Academy and face the carnage I left in my wake, but I’d be lying if I said my heart isn’t beating a little faster at the thought of seeing the rest of the Knox brothers again.
When I come back down, it takes me a moment to comprehend the scene before me. Sawyer is sitting at our table holding a bag of frozen peas up to his face. My father can be heard shouting from the next room and my brother and Smalls are nowhere to be seen.
I really don’t want to know, but I ask anyway.
“Are you okay?”
“I’m fine. They’re insanely protective of you,” he mutters.
“When it comes to some things, yeah they are.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asks, looking sharply at me.
“They protect me from outsiders, from physical harm, but they don’t consider the damage they do to me themselves.”
Why did I just say that? I instantly feel disloyal to my family for blurting out our current difficulties, but I blame this damn connection I share with Sawyer. He makes me open up to him even when I don’t want to. Horror must show on my face because Sawyer tells me not to worry, he won’t say anything.
“Are you sure you want to do this? Leave now, I mean?”
“Please. If I don’t go now, I might be tempted to run,” I tell him honestly.
I want out of this house and I don’t want to say goodbye. I’ve kinda done that already with my dad, and Chelsea will just cry too much. Aadi and Smalls…well, they’re not dead to me – I’m notthatdramatic – but they can certainly sit and stew for a while. Especially Smalls.
I think of Sarah’s pretty face and green anger bubbles up inside me. It’s not jealousy. Not at all. Fuck him. And fuck her too.
