Page 32 of Christmas Wish
Ryder cleared his throat. “I’m the same person. I need you to help me get through this. I need you and Colt.”
“I’m sorry, but deformities … amputations, all that kind of stuff has always creeped me out. I know it makes me sound like a horrible person, but I can’t help it. You have your family to get you through this.”
“It’s not the fucking same. You and I are going to be married for fuck’s sake.” His mouth felt like the Sahara Desert; he reached over and grabbed the glass and took a deep drink of water. “I need to see and hold Colt.”
“I can’t marry you. I’m sorry … I really am.”
“Fuck you! You don’t have to see me, but you’re not going to deny me my son. I’ll send two tickets. Your asswillcome to the hospital, and the nursewillbring him in to see me.”
Another pause.
“Okay. Send the tickets, but I won’t change my mind about visiting you. It’s over. Again … I’m sorry.”
“You never fucking came,” Ryder said out loud. “You took my son and left. I never got to say goodbye to him.”
Brutus erupted in a barking fit when a loud bang on the window dragged Ryder from the past. He looked over and saw Hawk’s grinning face. Ryder lifted his chin at him.I gotta get a fucking grip on things. I’m blaming Savannah for Dana hurting me.But truthfully, he was scared to death that Savannah now saw him as less of a man just like Dana had.Dammit to hell!
“Open the fuckin’ door. It’s cold as shit out here,” Hawk said.
Brutus ran to the door barking as Ryder rose to his feet. “Brutus, calm the fuck down!” he yelled, turning the doorknob.
“How’re you doing, buddy?” Hawk stomped his feet then shrugged off his jacket and gloves before kicking off his boots. Animal, one step behind Hawk, followed suit.
“Not bad. Thanks for helping out,” Ryder replied.
“No worries.” Hawk smacked him on the back. “Throttle said you’re making chili. Why the fuck don’t I smell anything?”
“Yeah,” Animal added. “I was thinking about it as I shoveled.”
“Just starting it now. Have a seat in the family room, and I’ll join you guys in a bit.”
Hawk and Animal put four bottles of Jack on the counter. “We need three glasses, bro,” Animal said.
Hawk went over to the cupboard and took them down. “Throttle and Rags should be done in a few.” He handed the tumbler to Ryder, and the three men clinked glasses together before throwing back the shot.
“Fuck, that’s good,” Ryder said, pouring more of the amber liquid in their glasses. “Jack’s one of my best friends.” The men laughed.
“I’m pretty sure we can all say that.” Animal raised his arm. “Here’s to Jack.”
Taking two of the whiskey bottles with them, the two Insurgents sauntered into the family room and sank down on the couch while Ryder hurriedly browned the meat, spices, and onion mixture.
An hour later, a pungent, smoky aroma wafted through the air as the men sat in front of the fire, popping nuts and pretzels in their mouths and talking about motorcycles as the chili simmered on the stove.
“Do you have any bottled water, bro?” Animal asked, standing up.
“In the fridge,” Ryder replied. Having his brothers around him was the best medicine for busting up his earlier self-pity party.I couldn’t have been any more pathetic.
“Bring me one,” Throttle said.
“Me too,” Rags added.
Animal grumbled something under his breath, and the guys chortled.
“How’s your dad doing?” Ryder asked as Animal handed him the water bottle.
“He’s got his good and bad days. I ran by there earlier today, and he seemed in good spirits, but he’s also good at faking it.” Animal unscrewed the bottle and took a big gulp.
“Tell him I said hi.” Ryder stared at the fire and a comfortable silence fell over the group. Animal’s dad had it way worse than Ryder did—two of his legs had gotten blown to smithereens in Iraq.
