Page 90 of Paco
His hand stopped in the middle of her back. “How do you know about Cassie?”
“I snooped, but not on purpose. I was trying to make room for my underwear when I found the envelope. I’m sorry, but I couldn’t resist. I read some of the letters. Don’t hate me.”
Years of memories flooded into his head, bumping into each other: his mother’s butchered body, Cassie’s hair glowing in the sunlight, his father’s crocodile tears, him and Cassie riding on his Harley, his sister’s gut-wrenching sobs when their father was convicted, Cassie’s betrayal. As the snippets from the past tangled around each other, other memories pushed them away: images of Chelsea, sick and vulnerable, sipping hot tea in the diner on a rainy night; her beautiful eyes boring into his; her soft lips; her laughter; her kindness amid so much suffering; and her strength.
“Are you mad at me for reading them?”
He bent down and kissed her gently. “No, I’m not mad. That was a long time ago. It was because of her that I decided women couldn’t be trusted.”
“Do you still feel that way?”
“Not since I met you. You’ve touched me in ways I can’t explain. You’ve brought out so many emotions that I thought I’d buried a long time ago.”
“You did the same for me. Before I met you, I thought that all men did was cause great suffering, that they couldn’t be trusted. For years I thought my gender was a curse, and I would never enjoy sex and be normal again. You changed all that for me.”
He kissed the top of her head. “I’ve only told one woman that I loved her, but since you came into my life, I’ve realized that the love I had for Cassie was not sustainable. Yeah, I loved her, but you’re the first woman I’ve ever been in love with. I’m crazy about you, baby. For a long time I fought it because I didn’t want to give up the bitterness, and I thought it would be better for you to try and build your life with your family. I didn’t want to be your rebound relationship. I didn’t want to get hurt again.”
“I’d never hurt you. I’m in love with you, and it feels wonderful. I think I’ve loved you from that very first night you let me sleep in your room because I was sick. I’m so dreadfully sad that you’re leaving. I don’t feel whole without you. You fill in the cracks that keep the darkness out.”
“It’s gonna be hard to let you go. It took almost losing you to kick some fucking sense into me.
She pulled his face closer to hers and kissed him passionately. “If you love me then why are you letting me go?” she asked against his lips.
“Because you need to live your life. You need to be independent, meet new people, and fulfill your life without me for a while. You have to get to know yourself again and your family.”
“But I don’t want to be without you,” she said softly.
He stroked her cheek, his eyes boring into hers. “I know, but I need to let you spread your wings. If we truly love each other then we can be apart for a while and come back together and still have the same feelings.”
Her lips trembled and he embraced her to him, his resolve melting with every breath he took. He wanted nothing more than to take her back to Alina and make her his old lady, but he knew she had to make sure what they had was real. For the past eight years her life had been suspended, and she needed time for reflection, for healing before they could come together.”
“I love you, Paco.” Her voice hitched.
“And I love you, Chelsea. Don’t ever forget that.” Warmth spread through him as he held her close and listened to her light breathing. “You should call your mom and let her know you’re okay.” She pulled away and he wiped the tears from her cheeks.
“What am I going to tell her about Aunt Sandy and Uncle Dave? Will she believe me? I have to call the police.”
“I’ll take care of them. You just let your mom know you’re okay.”
“How will you take care of them?” She glanced up at him. He didn’t answer. “I don’t want them hurt. I know what they did to me was despicable, and I still can’t believe it. I hate them for it, but I don’t want their suffering to be on my conscience. Promise me you won’t hurt them.”
“I can’t promise shit like that.”
“Paco, please. Let the law handle this. I’m sure I wasn’t the only one they did this to.”
He sat rigid, looking out the window.I can’t let them go. They betrayed my woman, and they know too much.“Did you tell them I was a Night Rebel?”
“No. I didn’t say anything about you. They kept thinking you were a trucker. They knew you lived in Colorado and I was surprised about that, but I never confirmed that either. They told me today that Bobby had told them I was in Alina. I think Bobby thought you were a trucker.”
“Where is the fucker? I’m surprised he wasn’t here.”
“I think Victor killed him. He didn’t say it, but he hinted at it.”
“Call your mom now.”
She nodded, and a tacit understanding evolved between them. Then she picked up the phone and dialed while Paco pulled her back into his embrace and held her close.
