Page 57 of Outlaw Xmas
“Mine was only the first trimester, and then I felt great after that,” Clotille said.
“Same here,” Cherri replied.
“What about you, Cara?” Belle asked.
Without turning around, she shrugged.
“If you need anything at all, let me know, okay? I’ve never been pregnant, but I can do food runs for you. I know the restaurants you love.” Kimber slipped her jacket on. “I have to get back to the shop.”
“I’ll call you. We got to get you eating some healthier food than takeout every night,” Belle said.
“Right now the thought of food makes me want to barf. Thanks, everyone. I’m headed home. I’ll see you on Saturday night. I do feel better by the time evening rolls around, at least.” Baylee slung her purse over her shoulder and walked out with Kimber.
“I have to get going as well. I want to get in some Christmas shopping before I have to pick Paisley up at school. Later.” Cherri went toward the door.
“Wait up, Cherri. I’ll walk out with you.” Clotille waved at Belle. Pointing at Cara’s back, she mouthed, “What’s wrong with her?”
Belle shrugged and watched the two women leave. Closing the door, she went up to Cara. “Do you want to talk about it?” she asked softly.
“There’s nothing to talk about. I better get going. I promised my mom I’d cook dinner tonight.”
“You’re staying at your parents’? Is Hawk good with that?”
Cara whirled around, facing her. “I don’t give a damn what Hawk’s good with.” She crossed her arms. “We’re going through a rough patch.”
“Is this about the gossip Doris circulated this past Sunday? She was on the phone with me before I even took my shower. I didn’t call you because I figured you weren’t going to let her get to you.”
“Hawk didn’t come home this past Saturday night. We had a fight before he went to the club party, but he didn’t pick up any of my calls or answer my texts. The asshole didn’t even tell me he was going to crash at the club.” Cara’s voice hitched.
Belle grasped her hands, but Cara pulled them away. “Hawk not calling you was rude and inconsiderate, and I’d rake Banger over the coals if he did that to me. Banger said Hawk was really wasted. He could hardly walk. He also said that the new girl, Heather, kept trying to cozy up to him, but he pushed her away. When Hawk left to go upstairs, he was alone.”
“Doris wouldn’t make that shit up. She’s a gossip, but she doesn’t lie.”
“I’m not saying she’s lying. She probably heard some stuff going on around the club and blabbed it without finding out all the facts, or whether it was true or not. I don’t know what happened, but I know Hawk. He’s so in love with you, and he loves Isa and Braxton to death. I can’t see him throwing all that away. What has he told you about what happened?”
“We haven’t really talked about it. I was so pissed and upset. I didn’t want to have a blown-out fight in front of the kids.”
“You should’ve taken the kids to your parents’ and stayed home and talked with Hawk. I can’t believe he hasn’t stormed over and dragged you and the children back home.”
“He’s called a ton of times and texted, but I think he’s letting me cool down. Anyway, if he cheated on me, he’s out. There’s no way I can forgive him.”
“But you have to talk to him first. Cara, you can’t run to your parents when the going gets tough. Marriage is a lot of hard work, but you work through it together. You and Hawk have to figure things out on your own.”
“I appreciate what you’re saying, Belle, but I’m still very hurt and pissed off.”
Belle inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled. “That damn Doris. She’s always waiting for the married brothers to cheat on their wives like Ruben does on her, and Marlena’s just as bad because Billy’s always screwing the club girls at the parties. Misery loves company. Do youreallybelieve Hawk cheated on you?”
“I never thought I’d even have to ask myself that question. Who knows when it comes to men? Years ago, I was engaged to a guy and found out right before our wedding he’d been cheating on me. I can’t believe this shit is going on with Hawk. Men just can’t be trusted to be monogamous. Whatever, I have to go. Thanks for being a friend.”
“Talk to Hawk. Fight for your marriage. That’s the end of my two cents. If you need anything, call me. I’ll walk out with you.”
On her way home, Belle couldn’t get Cara and Hawk out of her mind. A woman had to be more secure than the average when she loved an outlaw biker. In the beginning, Belle obsessed about the club parties Banger attended, knowing that a bevy of young women threw themselves at him. It had been so bad that she’d have panic attacks when he was gone. The night Ethan rushed into her room when she was having a meltdown, fear and heartbreak etched on his face, was when she’d realized she had to stop torturing herself. After that, she’d watch a movie with Ethan or go out with the other old ladies. And then she made sure to show Banger how lucky he was that he’d come home after one of the parties.
Investing a ton of money in lingerie, sex toys, candles, and scented oils, she’d greet him as he came home with a big kiss that promised much more. In time, he started coming home earlier until he only went to one every couple of months.
When she arrived home, she opened the refrigerator. Staring at packages of ground beef, steak, and chicken, she sighed. For the past few weeks, she felt that her home life was on autopilot: make sure Ethan is on time for school, get Harley ready for school, make breakfast, pray that Emily goes through the day sober, clean the house, do laundry, make dinner. It seemed like it was the same day over and over again.
She closed the fridge and sent Ethan a text asking if he’d like to have an overnight at Jack’s house. His enthusiasticUr awesome, Mommade her smile. She then called Addie and asked if it was cool for Ethan to come over. Addie told her Jack would be thrilled. Emily and a friend were in Denver for a couple of days to do some Christmas shopping.
