Page 14 of An Earl's Bet
Hugo shuddered as his whole body froze.He would never have dared to even think of doing such things.“No.No.I did not.I followed every rigid rule to the absolute letter.Even the new ones that were made up every day.”It had taken all his energy to keep track of which rule applied when.
“What?”Earnest’s mouth dropped opened.
“My father ...”Hugo breathed out shakily.“Well, you may as well know this.If I didn’t follow the rules, my father would punish me.Bad things happen if I don’t know the rules and adhere perfectly to them.”
“Punish you?”
“Yes.”
“What do you mean, Hugo?”Earnest stood behind him, and wrapped his arms around Hugo’s waist and gently laid his head between Hugo’s shoulder blades.He tried to think of a story that wasn’t too bad, one that wouldn’t tell the whole truth.
“One time, I fell off my pony—” He’d been six years old, almost exactly one year after his mother had died.“—and he put me on his horse and rode to the end of the estate and left me there.Told me to walk home because if I couldn’t stay on my pony, I didn’t deserve to have one.”Hugo didn’t mention that his father had thrown him to the ground off his horse and he’d fallen awkwardly on his ankle.“One of the farm workers saw me walking and put me on his horse and we rode back to the house, but I’d arrived too fast.No little boy can walk that fast, my father said, and he took me back and made me do it again.”
“Hugo.”Earnest slid around him, always holding him, and looked up at him with tears in his brown eyes.“I’m so sorry.Your father was an ass.”
“Yes.But I still check for him every time I think about bending a rule.It’s been more than seven years since he died, Earnest.Seven years.When will this go away?”
“Maybe never, but you don’t have to deal with it alone.”Earnest kissed his chin and his throat, and then lifted his head and Hugo bent to kiss him.He threw all his pent-up worries into the kiss, pouring out all the things he couldn’t say—like how nice it was to have someone care about him—until he melted.Eventually he’d expended everything, and he was spent, ready to collapse when he realised something.
“Earnest?”
“Yes.”
“You knew before I said anything, didn’t you?”
“I didn’t know it was your father, but I assumed someone had hurt you.”
“Does everyone know?Can they tell just by looking at me?”His pulse sped up again.
Earnest shook his head slowly.“I have some experience in the matter of terrible fathers.”
“Your father would beat you too?”Hugo should not have admitted that.Panic infused his whole body, and from the way Earnest blinked, Hugo wondered if he’d said too much.He held his breath, waiting for the inevitable blows.
“Does it count as a beating if he would get me to work the billows all day to make me stronger?Does it count if he would ignore my burns and make me work harder?”
“Billows?”
“My father is a blacksmith.I was the oldest of his eight children, destined to learn the craft from him and take over when I reached the right age.”
“But you are a poet?”Hugo asked, dumbfounded at this new information.
“Yes.Much to my father’s disappointment, I was not a very good blacksmith.I often burned myself through inattention—” Earnest pulled up his shirt sleeves and showed Hugo several little scars on his forearms, “—and he thought I was a danger to him and the other apprentices, hence being put on the billows.”
Hugo stared at Earnest, trying to make sense of what he was saying.“Didn’t you say you grew up in an orphanage with the Duke of Edenwick’s stablemaster?”
“That is also true.When I was ten, it was obvious to everyone that I preferred to read books and despite all my father’s efforts, I had no practical skills whatsoever, and so my father sent me to the orphanage.He said that maybe they could find a trade that I was capable of, but he needed to focus his attention on training someone who was worth his time and effort.”
Hugo gasped.“He just sent you away?”
“Yes.”Earnest lifted his chin defiantly.“But now look at me.If I’d stayed, I would’ve been a terrible blacksmith, and instead now I’ve been knighted for my poetry.”Earnest smirked and waggled his eyebrows, and Hugo recognised it immediately; that need to find the good in a terrible situation.He’d done that too; telling himself that his father needed to treat him like that because being an Earl took responsibility and could only be done by someone who could follow the rules.
“You said my father was an ass.I think yours was too.”
“No, your father chose to treat you miserably for no reason.To punish a child who falls off a pony is illogical.My father merely treated me like labour, which is practical because we were poor.He had mouths to feed, and I needed to earn my keep.When I couldn’t, he made a pragmatic choice.But your father...he chose violence, and it was completely unnecessary.”
Hugo couldn’t talk.There was too much emotion clogging up his throat, and so he buried his head against Earnest’s neck instead.
“An Earl’s son should be enjoying the privilege of his life and getting away with mischief.He shouldn’t be cowering away in fear for his safety.”