Page 36 of Vow of Darkness
All I know is right now I have to get rid of this ache inside my body. I need to find an actual release.
I never bothered to touch myself before. Not when I was going to bed hungry most nights or working long hours to survive. Other things were more important than physical pleasure.
But right now, all I can think about is the ache between my legs.
Laying back on the bed, I spread my legs wide and slip my panties down. There’s something so taboo about this. Something so exciting. Finally having the time to explore my body.
My hand slips between my legs and I press down on my clit. A sudden surge of pleasure hits me but it’s not enough. A whimper escapes me as I rub myself but I find that my own touch pales in comparison to Gabriel’s. It shouldn’t matter. Touch is touch and yet…
When he pressed his hand between my legs, I had never experienced such pleasure before. My own touch just isn’t as good.
I push that thought from my mind. No. I will make myself come. I have that power. Gabriel does not control every part of me.
I shut my eyes but I only see Gabriel’s face in my mind. His dark, intense eyes. His strong, large build. His scar that is both ugly and beautiful.
My body throbs with pleasure at the sight of his face. I open my eyes to try and get rid of him but it only makes my body get further away from achieving my release.
With a sigh, I press down harder on my clit but it does nothing. I’m not getting any closer to an orgasm. In fact, the pleasure I faced from my dream is starting to fade.
Why is my body doing this? It can’t be because of Gabriel… can it? How can I handle the thought that the man who has brought misery to my life is also the man I can’t stop thinking about. Who is the man that brings me pleasure like nothing else ever has?
No. I will find my release on my own terms.
I roll onto my stomach and grind my hips down against my hand. A surge of pleasure hits me but it’s still not enough.
I try harder and faster but nothing is working.
With a frustrated sigh, I roll onto my back but before I can remove my hand from between my legs, my bedroom door opens. I’m expecting it to be Maria.
Of course it’s not Maria who comes into my room.
Gabriel storms inside only to stop when he sees what I’ve been doing.
I quickly remove my hand from between my legs but when I go to close them, Gabriel speaks. “Don’t.”
I hold still, barely even breathing.
Gabriel stalks over to me just like in my dream but I know this is real life this time.
“What are you doing?” he murmurs.
“I think it’s obvious,” I say, trying to sound brave but my voice is too quiet for that.
“It looks like you were pleasuring yourself. If you need anyone to pleasure you, it will be me.”It will be me, I notice he says. Not asking if I want this. He’s so sure of himself and I hate him for it. But I also know he’s right. Gabriel is the one who can give me pleasure. Not myself.
“I wasn’t finished.”
“So you haven’t come yet?”
My face flushes. “No.”
“Then let me. I’ll be the one to make you come.” He kneels on the bed and grips my knees, bringing my legs wider apart. With a low sound in his throat, he shoves my dress up around my waist. “You’re never going to hide your pussy from me.”
A flare of arousal hits me, making my inner walls clench. My hips shift around of their own accord. The power Gabriel has over my pleasure makes me hate him and yet, it makes me desperately want him at the same time.
“What are you doing here?” I ask. “You never come into my room.” Maybe I can distract him. Or maybe I can distract myself and my confusing, conflicting feelings.
“It doesn’t matter why I came in here. I found you touching yourself. Only I’ll touch you.”
