Page 169 of Fierce Storm
My body heats, making my hands clammy. My mind takes me back to when I was twenty-four, and try as I might, I can’t stop the emotion welling in my chest. I was able to tell Easton and Paige with a clear head. Now I want to cry?
“Fuck, Keeley. What happened?”
“How do you know something happened?” I laugh softly, hoping it will help ease the pain.
“I can see it in your eyes.”
I nod as I find the right words. It was much easier to yell it in anger at dinner the other night than it is to speak the truth now. But with Sal looking at me with his penetrating gaze, his eyes holding so much warmth, I know that I’m safe.
“I got pregnant when I was twenty-four. The asshole dad abandoned me the second he found out. But it wouldn’t have mattered. With or without a loving partner, I knew I didn’t want to be a mom. And I hated myself for it. I cried nonstop for almost a week. Then I threw myself into work and started looking into adoption agencies.” A lump catches in my throat, and I swallow it down as tears fill the backs of my eyes.
Sal jumps up from his chair and lifts me again, this time pulling me onto his lap while keeping my ankle on the pillows.
“You don’t have to talk about it anymore, Keeley. I’m sorry I pushed you. I’m sorry I didn’t believe you when you said you didn’t want kids. I?—”
I press a finger to his lips to stop him from saying more, needing to get it all off my chest. “I lost the baby at thirteen weeks. And I blamed myself for that loss. I didn’t want a baby. I thought I was doing all the right things, but maybe I wasn’t because I didn’t care for it like I should have.”
I frantically wipe my eyes until Sal removes my hands, replacing them with his own as he softly swipes his thumbs across my cheeks.
“No, Keeley. That’s not on you. A miscarriage isn’t your fault. None of it’s your fault.” He pulls me tighter into his hold and kisses my forehead, bringing about more tears. I thought I’d shed the last of them years ago. I was wrong. Like everything else, I’d bottled it up, waiting for the right person to share it with.
I curl into him, letting myself be vulnerable until my emotions subside.
“I’m sorry that happened to you, Keeley,” Sal whispers softly before falling quiet, waiting for me, giving me all the space that I need.
I’m not sure how much time passes before I finally pull away, sniffling with a smile. “Thank you. For letting me break a little.”
“You don’t need to thank me for that. I’m here for anything you need. Always. I hope you know that?”
“I do. I promise. And the same goes to you.”
“Good.”
“Do we have any other hurdles to jump over?”
“You mean besides the fact that I’m your brother’s father-in-law and you’re my daughter’s best friend?”
“Yes, besides that.”
“No, I think we’re good.”
I snort out a laugh when he delivers his words with a straight face, and Sal cracks a smile. His first since I started telling him about my past.
“Anything you need to get off your chest?”
“Ahhh. Yeah. I might be in a little trouble with the Mikklesons. They’re not happy about Camilla testifying against them.”
“Yeah, Paige mentioned that.” I frown momentarily and silently curse Paige. She needs to tell him she’s testifying too. It’s going to kill him to know she’s been hiding that fact. “What are you going to do?”
“I’m not sure yet. My girlfriend kind of threw my plans into disarray when she broke her ankle.”
“Your girlfriend?”
“Yeah. It sounds strange saying that at my age. But it’s what I want. If you do.”
“I do. I actually like the sound of it.”
“Good.” He presses a chaste kiss to my lips then glances down at me, his expression serious.
