Page 40 of Not Looking
Something ached in my chest at his words.
He rubbed my back. “I haven’t seen you this torn up over an alpha in a long, long time. I think that means something.”
I snorted. “Says the man who went away for work and came home with a fated mate.”
He sighed, wrapped an arm around my shoulders, and pulled me close.
“I’m scared,” I whispered as I settled my head on his shoulder. “I can’t do it again.”
“You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. Besides, you’re older now. He probably is, too. Unless you’ve got a thing for much younger alphas.”
“Ew,” I replied, scrunching my nose.
He chuckled. “My point is that he’s probably got the maturity that those assholes lacked. Things could go bad, but they could go amazingly too. You won’t know if you don’t give him a chance.”
“So… just… do nothing?”
“For now. You only go to the mill every few weeks, right?”
“Yeah.”
“See how he is next time you go. If he’s still fiddling with wood he sets aside for you, that’s a good sign.”
“Don’t go back tomorrow?”
He laughed. “Don’t go back tomorrow. For him, but also for you. If he’s collecting scraps for you, let him get a nice stash. And if it’s not meant to be, then you won’t have made it obvious that you noticed.”
I nodded. “Ok.”
We sat in silence for several minutes, him rubbing my arm while the sun warmed us. Every so often, the wind would shift just enough to carry Craig’s scent to me.
“Ready to show me your new work?” Kerry eventually asked. “Or do you need a few more minutes?”
“Anything in particular you’re looking for?”
“Natural edges. I can probably talk them into a charcuterie set since they’ll entertain. Then some bowls, maybe a hollowform or vase if you’ve got one that’s really stunning.”
I chuckled. “So you pretty much just want to browse.”
“Yep.”
“Ok.”
I started to stand, but he pulled me back down.
“Hmm?” I asked.
“Changed my mind,” he said. “I think I want to sit here with you for a few more minutes.”
“Why?”
“Because I think you need it.”
I smiled. “You’re not wrong.”
“Let’s go axe-throwing this weekend,” he said. “Just you and me.”
“You hate axe-throwing.”
