Page 146 of Dirty Like Zane
“No. It doesn’t make you an idiot, Maggie.” I sighed myself; it fucking ate me up when she talked to that prick, because it always ended the same way—with Maggie hurt andupset.
Andshit, but I wanted to be a better man than herfather.
I was pretty fucking sure I was. I was pretty sure Maggie didn’t think I was the dirtbag her dad was, either… but I wasn’t sure her heart reallyfeltthe difference between the two of usyet.
“Don’t be too hard on yourself, Maggs, okay? I’m telling you. When it comes to our relationship, you always knew better than I did where we were at. If it was up to me, we would’ve been fucking from day one, and that would’ve been a travesty because I was a fucking drunk, and I know I would’ve fucked everything up even worse than I have now, and we never would’ve made it thisfar.”
“You haven’t fucked everything up, Zane,” she said, her voicesoft.
“Right.”
She slipped her hand over my knee. “I told you the night we got married that you were a damn good husband. In a lot of ways, you really havebeen.”
I cocked an eyebrow at her. “Ihave?”
“Yeah,” she said. “You love me. I don’t doubt that you love me with every part ofyou.”
I slid my hand over hers and squeezed gently. “What can I say? You’re under my skin, MaggieMay.”
She sighed unhappily at that and shook her head. “God. You must think I’m a realbitch.”
A smile twitched at my lips. “Sometimes.”
She frowned and bit herlip.
“You think I’m just like your dad,” I remindedher.
“Actually,” she said, her eyes searching my face, “I think I’m finally seeing that you’re not like him at all. You care, Zane. You care about me, alot.”
“Noshit.”
“I mean, you really care. You care how I feel about things. You care if they forget to bring the honey for my coffee at breakfast, and you care if you’re going onstage and I haven’t come by to see you yet, and you care if my dad is an asshole tome.”
“Yeah, well. You hate it when you have to use those little sweetener packetsinstead.”
“You care,” she said, her eyes soft as she gazed up at me, “about all the stupid little things, and the big things,too.”
“Yeah.”
She smiled at me a little, and I got lost in her gray eyes for a long moment. I wanted to kiss her, but it didn’t feelright.
Not until I knew she was happy, and she wasn’t hung up on this Dizzy shitanymore.
“Hey,” I said, clearing my throat, “you remember that time the airline lost your luggage? It was like the first flight we ever took together, the first year you were with Dirty? I was pretty fresh back from rehab, so I was the only one not out at the bar. I saw you talking to the airline on your phone in the lobby of our hotel and trying not to lose your shit. You were so frazzled. It was late, and you were wearing a little dress and high heels that you’d flown in. I figured you’d want something comfortable to change into, so I swung by your room a little later with one of my T-shirts and a pair of sweats. You invited me in, and then you went into the bathroom to change, and when you came back out you looked so fucking adorable in my big T-shirt. You had my sweats all rolled up at the waist. You were swimming in my clothes. I had no idea what I was gonna wear to the gym in the morning. All I knew was I needed you in my clothes that night. You looked so fucking sexy—and so grateful, by the way—and I didn’t even try to get in your pants. That’s how much I care,Maggie.”
“Wow,” she whispered. “Such a gentleman.” I wasn’t even totally sure if she was being sarcastic ornot.
“Iknow.”
Then she leaned in and kissed me, her lips just barely brushing mine. It was a sweet, soft kiss that made my toes fucking curl. My dick snapped to attention and my nipples hardened, too, the piercing in the left one pulling at my shirt abit.
She’d been gone for most of the day today. It was a matter of hours, butfuck, I’d missed her. And when she was here… we’d pretty much beenfighting.
This was a hell of a lotbetter.
She smelled good, too. Sogood…
“Think I fell in love with you that night,” I whispered against herlips.
