Page 46 of Dirty Like Me
“You’re going to sleep,” he went on. “And in the morning, you can let me know what you decide. No pressure. You come with me on tour, or you don’t and we forget about all of this. You go back to your life, and I never bother you again.”
One thing I knew: I did not want that. But it was dangerous to want what I was beginning to want when I looked in Jesse Mayes’ eyes.
“But first…” He took my plastic sword and empty glass and set them aside, holding my gaze. “I want you to knowwhythe guys don’t think bringing you on tour is a good idea, and why I’ll do it anyway. I’ve never brought a girl on tour with me before, Katie. Other than Elle, but we’re in a band together, and even then it didn’t work out so well. My friends aren’t used to me getting serious about anyone so fast, and they don’t see how it will help the tour. They think the only way the media or the fans or the record company will give a damn about the girl I’m dating is if she’s some starlet or supermodel. Someone more famous, more glamorous than Elle.”
I cringed, inwardly. He really didn’t need to spell out for me all the ways I didn’t measure up to his ex-girlfriend. Clearly I was nowhere near as glamorous. Or as talented. Certainly not as famous, even with our steamy video burning up the charts.
“They don’t think anyone will care if I show up on tour with an ordinary girl,” he said. “And by ordinary, I mean not famous. But here’s the thing, Katie. I think they’re wrong about that. And for the record, I don’t think there’s an ordinary thing about you. The world got a glimpse of that in the video. It’s what your ex saw. It’s why that video has been viewed online overseven hundred million timesalready.”
My stomach did an uncomfortable flip, because I still couldn’t quite digest that fact. “You don’t have to say that.” No matter what he said, I knew it washimand the incredible song that had people watching that video.
The bartender came for our glasses and Jesse told her, “I’ll take the bill.”
“No chance, sweetheart,” she replied. “Gentleman at the end of the bar took care of it.”
Jesse looked kinda pissed at that. He acted like he was oblivious to the woman practically drooling as she said goodnight, before finally walking away when he only stared me down.
I wondered if he got that a lot. I wondered if the bartender was drooling because she knew who he was, or if that didn’t even matter when you looked like he did. When you exuded that kind of effortless, feral sexuality. The kind that told a woman, without words, what he could do to her.
The kinds of things he pretended to do to me in that video.
Jesse sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. He looked tired, something I hadn’t picked up on before. My own drunkenness and hurt feelings had gotten in the way of seeing what this night meant to him, and what it had taken out of him. Suddenly I felt ashamed of my selfishness, my petty drama over my ex.
Josh wasn’t worth this. I should never have let him get to me or get in the way of whatever time I might have with Jesse Mayes, even if our relationship wasn’t real.
“I’m sorry,” I said. “This isn’t your problem.”
“It isn’t yours either.” His eyes locked on mine again. “Look. I don’t know what he saw all those years. Those five years you were together, and all those times he fucked you and told you he loved you. Or that day when he left you at the altar. But he wasn’t seeing you.” His gaze searched my face, heating my skin. “You’re more than that, Katie. You’re more than the girl he abandoned, and you’re more than the girl in bed with me in that video. If you come on tour with me, you’ll have a chance to show the world, including him, who you are, if that’s what you want.”
“But that’s not really me, either,” I said. “Your fake girlfriend.”
“No one knows that. They don’t know you yet. You can be whoever or whatever you want to be, starting tomorrow morning, and the world will believe you. Your ex believed it. That’s why he hosted this party. To see for himself. That video gave him a glimpse of what he’s missed out on, and now he’s got regrets.”
And that’s when it struck me, as I stared at his beautiful face in the flickering candlelight. That all the time I was worrying if I was going on a date with some rich, entitled asshole who might turn into a creep at any second, I should’ve been preparing for a different scenario. Because what if Jesse Mayes turned out to be nice?
No; fuck nice. I could handle nice.
What if Jesse Mayes turned out to beawesome?
I swallowed as his dark gaze skimmed my lips. “I don’t know about that, Jesse.”
“I do.” He stood and offered his hand to me. “Don’t live with regrets, Katie Bloom.”
CHAPTER 11
KATIE
I woke near dawn, hungover as all fuck.
Correction: still a little drunk.
Morning light was beginning to bleed around the edges of the blackout curtains as I blinked my crusty eyelids open. The clock by my head said it was six seventeen. The light of the digital display stabbed at my brain and I closed my eyes, groaned, and rolled over, intending to go right back to sleep. Which was when I realized I wasn’t alone.
I was in bed with Jesse Mayes.
Naked.
I rubbed my eyes until I could see straight. Until I was sure of what I was seeing.
