Page 11 of Finding His Happiness
“I can, based on my partner’s preference, but it goes back to liking the things that make my sub happy, content in some way, or aroused.” He seemed to be enjoying being cuddled and petting me, so it wasn’t hard to understand. “But those all fall into activities I’d enjoy in a variety of ways. Like when I told you about the cockwarming scene...having a sub naked and caged during that activity would make it even better.”
“That doesn’t sound stressful or difficult to understand.” Some of the things I’d seen online had been much more complicated. “Why wasn’t that listed higher in the online articles about easy ways to explore BDSM?”
My Dom made a thinking sound as his hand shifted to stroke my back, but I liked that he was thoughtful. “I think giving up that kind of control makes a lot of men uncomfortable. I think it might be the idea of erections and things having to do with a penis being very tied to manliness.”
Oh.
“That’s interesting and explains the lists better.” Things that didn’t test manliness as much were probably higher on the list toease nervous people into the lifestyle. “I don’t see it that way if you’re wondering.”
“I wasn’t. I knew you didn’t see it that way.” Because he was smart and that was so nice I couldn’t help snuggling against him. “I also know you’re curious, though, so we can put it higher on our list.”
“Would it be odd to tell you that I like the way you understand me?” Being held was nicer than I’d expected but the understanding part was amazing.
“No. We all want to be understood but some people are more complicated than others.” Tracing his finger around my ear, he smiled. “I like complicated. It’s much more interesting.”
I didn’t mind being interesting...I’d been called a lot worse and his tone was...warm, maybe.
“I’m glad.” For a variety of things. “I wasn’t sure I’d find anyone I could relate to tonight. I was actually expecting to have to go back to online searches or try to date.”
My shudder had his chest jerking but he managed not to laugh. “We won’t have to do anything terrible like that, butI’mglad you seem to want to see me again after tonight?”
Nodding against his chest, I decided he needed confirmation and possibly some kind of emotional connection I didn’t quite understand. “Yes, I would like to continue our time together tonight and I would like to see you again.”
Hmm.
“I’m enjoying our time together and not just to keep my house.” That was probably important too. “This has been more educational than I expected.”
“Thank you for letting me know.” My Dom made a pleased sound but the hug I got was very nice too. “And thank you for making your thoughts on the things you’d like to explore clear. I appreciate having a place to start as we move forward.”
“How are we going to move forward?” I liked what we were doing but I had to admit to a certain level of curiosity. “I didn’t expect this part to go so smoothly.”
“Well, I knew I’d like holding you, but I’m glad you’re enjoying it too.” My Dom continued to stroke my back and let out a quiet sigh as I continued to stroke the back of his neck. “One option would be to continue like this but we go through questions to help establish your initial limits. I think you’re ready for something more hands-on than that, though. The top of my mental list was to request a private room so you could explore my body more.”
“With your shirt off?” His chest was quite broad.
“What would you say if I told you I’d be completely naked?” His tone was very even but it seemed more of a what-if situation than a firm decision based on how it was worded.
“I would ask if that’s within your limits because those are very important, especially when we’re talking about your body.” Most people had very strong views on being naked.
“Yes. With you that would be within my limits.” For a moment I worried he’d stop there, but I should’ve known better. “The fact we’ve connected as well as we have makes a difference for me and I find the idea of being the first man you’ve explored like that incredibly erotic.”
Oh yes, we’d touched on that.
Ha.
Touched.
“But that brings up an issue of how comfortable you would be seeing my arousal either through my underwear or while I’m naked.” I appreciated his matter-of-fact tone, but I wasn’t sure how I felt. “Which was why I needed feedback from you.”
“Yes, but my feedback isn’t helpful. I’ve spent my entire life making sure I’m not in a situation where I have to be aroundother naked people. They’re weird.” People made strange decisions when they were naked.
“Explain weird in this context.” My Dom gave me a firm hug. “I want to make sure we’re on the same page with that word.”
Probably not...it hadn’t been a specific enough description.
“Teenage boys in high school were either so shy I didn’t know how to react around them or so...outgoing that I didn’t know how to act around them. There’s no good way for a sixteen-year-old to respond to another teenager who’s trying to helicopter his penis in the locker room.” All I could do was sigh as my Dom’s chest jerked.
“Adult males stop doing that eventually but then they want to have conversations while they’re in the locker room, but if they think you’ve noticed they’re naked they get angry.” They had ridiculous reactions. “The rules for how to behave when people are naked change entirely too often.”
