Page 68 of Off Limits
‘Shit,’ I say and look to the floor. ‘Sorry. I didn’t mean anything by it.’
‘It’s okay,’ she says with a smile. ‘I mean, sixteen is young. Sure it is. But the guy was my steady boyfriend at least. Same couldn’t be said for some of the other girls in my class.’
He slides one hand around the back of his neck. ‘I was nineteen. When I… you know. I had a girlfriend in high school, but she was part of this group of girls who were like this… purity gang. Saving themselves for their husbands or something. So that wasn’t happening. We kissed a few times but that was it.’
‘So, who was the girl when you were nineteen? College girlfriend?’
‘Yeah. We were both… we both had our V cards. I did the whole candles, soft-lighting, Taylor Swift soundtrack, pillows on the floor, all that stuff.’
She looks surprised.
‘What?’ I ask.
Surprise turns into what seems like embarrassment. ‘Nothing, I, just… that was nothing like my experience.’
I wait for her to continue. She doesn’t look me in the eye when she talks. ‘The night I lost my virginity, my boyfriend didn’t even ask how I felt after. I remember he went to dispose of the condom, then picked up the TV remote and watched an entire NBA game before saying another word to me… There was definitely no soft lighting or Taylor Swift keeping it all romantic.’
I watch her. God, she’s beautiful. I feel angry at her high school boyfriend, even though I can’t even picture his face. ‘Well, that guy’s a fucking idiot.’
‘He didn’t last very long. Both on the night in question, or after. Couple’ weeks later, he slept with a friend of mine.’
‘Wow.’
‘So I slept withhisfriend, shortly after that. As like a revenge thing, I guess.’
I laugh. ‘Holy shit. Still no Taylor Swift soundtrack?’
‘Definitely not. Ugh. It was at a house party. God, we were in somebody else’s bedroom with the door locked. I’m not proud of it. That one wasn’t romantic.’
‘Has there ever been a… you know… a romantic one?’
‘Once. I’d just turned eighteen. He worked in a paint factory. He was my boyfriend for a while. He was the most… considerate.’
‘Why’d you break up?’
‘We drifted.’ She sighs, the sigh morphing into a snicker. ‘Plus, he always smelled like turps.’
We both laugh. I’ll put him in the ‘fucking idiot’ category along with the rest of them.
‘What about you?’ she continues. ‘What happened to the college girlfriend? Taylor Swift soundtrack.’
‘Well…’ I feel myself blush. ‘She was the captain of the cheer squad.’
‘No!’ Serenity shrieks.
‘She cheated on me with my teammate.’
Her face falls. ‘Oh.’
‘I won’t lie. It kinda sucked.’
‘I’m so sorry.’
‘Didn’t you just tell me your boyfriend did the same thing?’
She gives a shrug. ‘I mean, sure, but we weren’t in love or anything, we were just dumb teenagers. So… what happened after that?’
‘Uh. I jumped from one serious relationship into another. Gracie Olavsen. Social sciences major. Kind of a brainiac. She dumped me. Said she didn’t wanna be a token NFL bride or have her career defined by any success I had as an NFL player. And that wasafterthe draft.’
