Page 92 of Out of Bounds
“I know,” he says, morning gruff in his voice.
I’m about to say, about us, too, but I don’t think I need to. I can’t fully understand his level of restraint but I think I know at least some of the reason Tanner is holding out on me, on us. He might know what I need better than I know myself.
I hold up my phone. “Auston called. At long last.”
He crosses his arms across his chest, pecs bulging even under his T-shirt. “Are you okay?”
It’s subtle but the difference between him asking me what Auston wanted and howIam isn’t lost on me. Tanner always putsmefirst, above Auston, before oursituation.
I nod. “He’s on his way to San Antonio to meet with the club. About the trade, I presume, but he wants to see Nelson and me after that.”
“Do you want to meet him?”
“You know I have to.”
“For Nelson?”
I give him a soft smile. “We’re sort of a package deal.”
He doesn’t smile back, only watches me, a line forming between his brows. “Do you need a ride somewhere?”
This man is unbelievable. Last night we were… intimate. Weslepttogether, in each other’s arms. Today, I’m going to meet another man. One I used to be hung up on, hook up with, who fathered my child. And Tanner asks me if I need a ride.
“Thank you but no. I’ll fix a car or ask Betty to take me.”
“Annie, it’s okay, I don’t mind.”
“Quit being so nice to me all the time, Tanner. You don’t have to be. You told me you like me and when I said it back, I meant it. I also meant it when I said I’m not sure what to do with that information, then I go and do whatever it was I did last night.”
“I wanted it too, Annie. I—” He rakes a hand through his hair the way he does. “I wantedmore. But if we go all the way, there’ll be no coming back for me, so I can’t risk that you don’t feel the same. I don’t want to be a guy you hook up with in secret. Can you understand that? If I make love to you, Annie, I’ll be all in.”
He knocks the wind right out of my sails. I’ve had this all wrong. Every doubt and question, it’s not his, it’s mine.I’mthe one holding back.
Am I ready? Do I feel the same? If I did, if I do, how does it work with Nelson and Auston?
“I’m going to get dressed.”
As I head upstairs, I look back to see him leaning on his forearms on the island, face in his palms, and the image cuts me deep. I’m hurting him.
There’s a park in the city with a kids’ sandbox, a coffee stand and plenty of tree and cactus cover to shield a football star from prying eyes.
Betty dropped Nelson and me with his buggy, then went for a walk herself to do some shopping. I’m nervous as we head into the fenced children’s area and spot Auston right away. He looks smarter than usual – trendy jacket over tailored pants, but he has his signature cap and shades in place.
Given how badly our last attempt at meeting went – viral in every sense – I have no idea what to expect.
My voice is timid as I approach him at the coffee stand. “Auston?”
He stares at me as if I’m unexpected, then at the buggy and the little boy who looks a lot like him, watching him through big blue eyes.
“Hey,” he says, to Nelson, then me.
It’s clear neither of us knows what to do or say next. Each quiet, twitchy. Do we hug, shake hands, fist bump?
I’m grateful when the server interrupts. “Two coffees. Milk’s on the side.”
Coffee.
“I didn’t know what to order for you. Is coffee okay?”
