Page 53 of Born of Starlight
When she saw my coy smile, the swirling darkness in her eyes sputtered out and her eyes returned to their warm brown stare. Her clenched fists loosened and her shoulders slackened. Here I was playing foolish games while she faced the weight of this world for the first time.
Damn it all. I’m an ass.I’d never meant to hurt her. I caught her arm gently as she tried to turn away.
“I’m so sorry, Asterie. Look at me.”
She glared past me, but she didn’t pull away. “Why are you acting like this? One minute you’re talking me down from a panic in Kullworth, and the next, you’re being…” She struggled to think of a word.
“A prick?” I answered for her.
She nodded unsurely, seeming surprised by my candor.
“Your laugh.” It came out a raw whisper. “It wrecked me. I have no idea why. It’s the most beautiful sound I’ve ever heard.”
She stilled and finally leveled a glare that held all the fire I knew her capable of. “Are youflirtingwith me now after implying I wanted to take Emmerick to bed? And implying that it is somehowmyfault—for simply laughing—that you are so mad? Hot, cold, hot, cold—pick a version of yourself to be, Fen.”
Her outrage was warranted. I stepped closer to her. “It is not your fault that it got under my skin. He made you feel joy, and yet I wanted to rip his head off. None of that is your fault. It’s mine for being a selfish ass.”
There were no longer daggers staring back at me. “Areyouthe jealous one?”
Her question hit my chest—I was.
“I am.”
We were in front of the inn now, and its gabled stone structure shadowed us there on the lawn. To leave me there, she would just need to take a few steps and walk through the wooden double doors.That would be smart.
Getting my feelings tangled up with an enchantress that would, without doubt, stomp on them.What a lovely idea.
“You have no reason to be jealous.”
“But, don’t I? He makes you happy. He will stay your friend.” My teeth gritted. “I’m a war criminal that you’re dragging around until I can aid your cause in Luz. Then you’ll be on your way.” To be used and discarded again. It would ruin me.
Her shoulders fell, and her expression softened further.No—not pity, anything but pity.“I hardly think we’ve dragged you. You came willingly,” she retorted.
I shook my head. “Thatis not the point. What comes of us after we finish whatever higher duty we serve? Will you and I be friends then?”
Her hand reached out as though she wanted to offer me comfort but stopped halfway. “Fen, this isn’t an issue with who you are. It’s an issue with whoIam. You will get to live in this world freely after the realm is safe, but I won’t. You will not see me. That’s not my place in this world.”
“Don’t go back to them.” My voice was strained. “You’ve seen it first hand—the work you’re doing is hurting people. Have you never thought about not going back?”
She stood there, mouth agape—like it truly was the first time anyone had offered her that choice. “You need to put that out of your mind. This infatuation might feel real now, but…”
Her voice was growing raspy, and her sentence hung unfinished. She was unsure, which gave me the confidence to take one step closer to her.
I could feel her heat and the rise and fall of her chest through our robes.Far too much clothing between us.
“Then tell me, Asterie.” I leaned down to whisper the dare into her ear. “Tell me now that you feel no connection to me. That you want to go back to your Sisterhood because there is nothing out here for you…”
Her breath warmed my cheek.Stupid, wishful words.
She said nothing, which was the answer I needed to know that she felt it too.
As I straightened, she pitched toward me, like a string was pulling her chest nearer to mine. Her flushed cheeks compelled me to whisper more pretty words to her. I had plenty of those.
“Asterie, my strange beauty. If you would just stop fighting this…I would give you all the gratifying distractions that your body could take. Those ‘fleeting moments’ of intimacy you warned me against back at my cabin? If you let me, I’d make fleeting moments feel like an eternity.”
Let me.The words were bold, forward, and yet not a stitch untruthful. She could lay me bare in more ways than one. I’d always been a sweet-talker, but this was one of the very few times I had meant it.
Her pupils dilated at my insinuation, and her lips parted. We were so close now that my breath mingled with hers.
