Page 124 of Gabriel
It’s not that easy to explain. The rape was bad. What Austin, Parker, and Gregory did to me, it seriously fucked me up. But everything afterward—realizing no one believed me. That nobody cared—it made everything so much worse.
There was no justice. No closure. My entire life was shoved over on its axis and theirs didn’t have so much as a bump in the road.
“That, plus everything that’s happened since.” It doesn’t help that I still go to school with those guys. That I have to see one or more of them almost every day.
“I imagine things began to feel hopeless at the time.”
Wiping my face, I nod. “Yeah. I guess so.”
“Do you still feel the same sense of hopelessness now?”
“I—” I cut myself off and consider her question. Life isn’t easy. It’s really fucking hard. I’m still dealing with the nightmares, the panic attacks, and what is probably a case of PTSD, but … I think about Gabriel. About joining the swim team. I think about the study session with Gabe’s roommates and about making a new friend. “No,” I tell her. “I don't feel hopeless like that.” Not anymore.
Our time ends shortly after that. She offers to extend the hour, but I’ve had enough for one day. She schedules my next appointment for a week from today ,and I leave her office, not feeling any better than when I first stepped inside.
When I walk to my car, I’m greeted by an unexpected surprise, though not an unwelcome one.
“What are you doing here?” Adriana stands beside my Jeep, a disposable coffee cup in each of her hands.
“Providing moral support in the form of caffeine.” She hands me one of the cups, and I bring it close to my chest. “It’s a hazelnut latte,” she tells me. “I don’t know what your regular order is.”
“This is perfect,” I tell her, taking a sip. Warmth seeps into me and I close my eyes, relishing the feeling as I exhale a deep breath.
I stopped by the restroom on my way out and splashed some water on my face, but I’m sure Adriana can tell I’ve been crying. Thankfully though, she doesn’t comment on it.
“We should do something fun this afternoon.” She climbs into the passenger seat of my SUV when I unlock it. Walking around, I settle myself inside and take another drink of my latte.
“Where’s your car?” I ask her.
“At home,” she says. “I took a rideshare, so we didn’t need to drive separately.”
Makes sense. We talked earlier about hanging out sometime today. Not that I expected her to show up outside of my appointment. But I’m not complaining. Already some of the ache in my chest is subsiding. Looks like Adriana is just what the doctor ordered today.
“Anything in particular you want to do today?” she asks as we make our way out onto the main road.
“Gabe asked if I’d come to his game this afternoon.” I don’t know why I said that out loud. I’d already decided against going.
Adriana turns to look at me, her penetrating stare drilling holes into the side of my face. “Do you want to go to Gabriel’s game?” she asks.
It feels like a trick question, so I shrug.
With a sigh, she slumps back in her seat. “That’s a yes.” I open my mouth to refute her statement, but she holds up a handto stop me. “It’s fine. We can go. I actually like soccer,” she tells me. “I played a little as a kid, and it’s been a while since I’ve gone to a game, so why not?”
She gives me another considering look. “How are you with crowds?”
“Not great,” I admit.
Her sculpted brows are drawn together. “Okay. We’ll park toward the back of the lot so we can get out of there fast if we need to. You do alright at school, so you’ll probably be fine as long as we avoid the crush of bodies when everyone rushes to leave at the same time.”
Sounds like a good idea.
“What time is the game?”
“Two,” I tell her.
“Perfect. Enough time to eat and get ready.”
CHAPTER 37
