Page 31 of Savage Devil
“Yeah. Follow me. We can go in the living room.”
I lead him through the house where Luis’s cartoons are still playing. Jae takes a seat on the sofa, a wary look on his face as he sizes Emilio up. I’m not sure what he’s looking for, but whatever it is, he doesn’t find it because his expression only seems to darken as the seconds go by.
“This is my friend, Jae. Jae, this is Emilio. Luis’s—”
“Bio-dad. Got it,” he bites out.
I scowl at him, not sure where his hostility is coming from, but also not having the energy to deal with it right now. “Do you think we can get together later?” I ask. “Emilio and I…” I pause. What do we need to do exactly? Talk, I suppose. I’m sure he wants to meet Luis. Play with him maybe.
“I can stay if you’d like,” Jae suggests, but I don’t miss the narrowing of Emilio’s eyes. “It might be good to—”
“That’s okay.” I cut him off. “This is probably something I should do alone.”
His jaw tightens, but he nods and climbs to his feet. “Okay.” He kisses the top of my head before doing the same to Luis. “Catch you later, little man. And Bibi,” I wait. “Think about what I said. Okay?”
“I’ll consider it,” I tell him, watching as he leaves. I wait for the sound of the front door closing behind him before I turn and face Emilio.
“Something I should know about?” he asks.
I shake my head. A part of me knows he would have a problem with me living with Jae and it’s not something I want to argue about right now. Not when we should be focusing on Luis. “No. It’s nothing.”
I take a seat on the floor, Luis in my lap and hand him a few blocks to play with. “He takes a few minutes to warm up to strangers,” I tell him, immediately regretting my choice of word. “But if you give him some time to adjust, he’ll make his way over to you on his own and hand you blocks or cars to play with him with.”
Shoulders stiff, Emilio nods and lowers himself to the ground across from me. He shrugs out of his coat, laying it on the sofa behind him. His shirt stretches across his broad shoulders, the fabric hugging his muscular form. I wet my lips and wring my hands in my lap.
Luis captures his entire attention, his gaze never straying from our boy. I watch emotions play over Emilio’s face. Curiosity, wonder, joy. He’s enamored with him already and a fist squeezes my heart inside my chest seeing the open affection he already has for him.
We both watch our son toddle around the room, one second crawling and the next walking as he collects his toys into one pile before throwing them as far as he can—which isn’t that far—across the room one by one, laughing as they hit the hardwood floor.
“He’s kind of a terror, isn’t he? Emilio asks, affection clear in his voice.
I smile. “Yeah. He likes the sound the blocks make when they hit the floor. It’s his favorite pastime these days.” One block lands particularly close to Emilio, and Luis crawls toward him to retrieve it. Emilio freezes when Luis sits up on his knees, brown eyes curious, as he holds the block out in his hand for Emilio to take.
“That for me?” he asks. His face is the softest I’ve ever seen it as he looks down at our son, carefully taking the toy from his tiny fingers. “Thanks.” Luis stares at him a moment longer before crawling right into Emilio’s lap and turning himself to the side to get comfortable. He reaches for the block in Emilio’s hand and he gives it to him, both arms winding around Luis’s small body and a wonder-struck expression on his face.
Luis doesn’t allow Emilio to hold him long before squirming in his arms to get back on the ground to play and Emilio reluctantly releases him.
“So…” I begin, because there are a lot of things we should probably talk about. “We should talk about, um, what it is you want.” God, even to my own ears that sounded lame.
His dark brown gaze finds mine and anger flashes for a split second before he nods once, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah. Well, I figured it’s pretty obvious.” He looks to Luis and his jaw clenches. “I want to be in his life. I want to be his dad.”
Okay. That sounds good and all, but…
“And I want regular visitation.”
I swallow hard and force my breathing to slow despite the rapid beating of my heart. What he’s asking for isn’t unreasonable.
“And I want it in writing, Bibiana. I want to be added to his birth certificate. I want our visitation schedule in writing and signed or notarized or whatever it needs to be for it to be official. I need to know you’re not going to disappear again and take him from me.”
My breath hitches and a trickle of apprehension slips beneath my skin. “I never meant—”
“It doesn’t matter. You did. I’m not risking that again, so those are my terms. I’ll pay child support or whatever. We’ll figure it out and I’ll do my part, but I want everything in writing so there is zero question that he is mine and I have rights.”
I lick my lips. “And if I don’t want to put everything in writing?” I ask because there is a needle of fear that tells me if I give him what he’s asking for, it will make it all the easier for him to one day take Luis away from me. I’m not saying he would, just…it’s a possibility. I don’t know Emilio. Not really. What if we get into an argument? What if he wants to take Luis out of town or to visit a distant relative and then never comes back. I know they’re what ifs, but that little boy is my entire world. The thought of losing him—
“Then we’ll get the courts involved. I don’t want to do that, Bibiana. I don’t want things to get any uglier than they already are but…” He trails off and shakes his head, turning his focus to Luis. “I won’t risk losing him.”
The mention of that word—court—makes my mouth run dry. He could take me to court, make demands, ask for even more than he’s asking for now and there is a good chance he would get it. I know people assume that the judge always favors the mother, but will that still hold true if they learn I kept his son from him? That he missed out on the first nine months of his life because of me? No. I don’t think it would. If he takes me to court, I could lose everything.
