Page 45 of Mended Souls
Looking out the window, I saw Blaize step away from Zachary as they went their separate ways. Tension visibly eased from her body as she made her way towards us, and I couldn’thelp the pang of jealousy that hit me. Realistically, she needed that closure, to ease the guilt weighing on her chest because of what happened to Layla. She still blamed herself and needed that reassurance from the people who loved Layla most, but I wanted to be the one who made her feel peace.
Hunter rolled down my window, and I smiled up at her, a stray tear falling from my eye. Blaize leaned over, caressing my cheek, wiping the tears. “Hunter will take you to Annika’s. I have to deal with Reaper business.”
I nodded, wanting her to kiss me, but frowned when she retracted her hand and stepped away, watching us as we drove off. “How did you two meet?” I asked Hunter. “I’m trying to keep my mind busy.”
She laughed lightly. “I was an anger-infused nineteen-year-old when Blaize and Olivia moved here. I was killing men and using women to get off because I never processed my own trauma.”
“Does everyone in this town have a tragic story? Me, Blaize, Annika, Drew.”
“Drew’s trauma is my trauma,” she muttered. “He’s my brother. We’re twins.”
My jaw fell to the floor as I stared at her. I knew Drew talked about a sister, but he never told me a name. How did I miss it when I saw the way they were together when Hunter brought me home? Her hair was lighter than Drew’s, but their facial features were identical now that I really looked at her.
I saw the sadness in her face before she quickly hid it. “You and Blaize both do that. Hide your pain.”
“It’s better that way, Kadence. Me and Drew really went through it growing up, and I never healed from seventeen years of shitty upbringing. Neither of us did. Drew had it easier because he was the boy, but it still wasn’t good. But he hasAnnika and those boys. I had him barely. We both pushed each other away ‘cause of the guilt we had.”
“You don’t have to tell me.”
“You tell me yours. I’ll tell you mine.” She laughed ruefully. “We grew up in church. As we got older, we realized it was more of a religious cult. My father was a hardcore Catholic man. We were walking on eggshells with him since my mother died in childbirth. I was the last one out. It was my fault she died.”
She sighed, her hand gripping the gear shift and I covered it with mine, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “He was a ruthless asshole, mourning my mom. Every day I would be punished. My sins were cleansed with my blood because I was the devil who killed my mother. When I was a child, I never understood why my father did it, but as I got older and heard him speaking with Father Isaiah, I knew. And when Drew would intervene, he would get beat, so I took it all to protect him.” She stopped the car in front of Annika’s apartment. “When I realized I liked girls, I was petrified—not because I believed the bullshit they preached, but because I knew what my father would do to me. It didn’t stop me. You don’t realize how many girls are curious when they grow up religious. I showed interest in women when I was young, kissed a girl for the first time at twelve, so that’s when the corrective therapy started.”
“I think I can piece it together,” I told her, my mind going down a rabbit hole of the one thing a religious zealot would do to a child.
“Yeah, everyone thinks they can piece it together, but it’s worse than what is assumed. After the corrective therapy, I pretended to be cured, that God removed the homosexual tendencies, but I was still gay. My mistake wasn’t being gay, it was being promised to the priest, but they disguised it. I was seventeen and I left a hickey on one of the girls I was with. Her father beat the truth out of her. She told them it was me. I neverblamed her.” Hunter shifted slightly. “My father dragged me to the sanctuary. And Father Isaiah grabbed me and told me,The demon will be gone and your soul saved when you realize a man is what your body desires. Then I was raped by the entire clergy. I had to repent and beg eight men for forgiveness, but the worst part was, Drew was forced to watch. He was beaten, and then my father made him keep his eyes on me.” She took a shaky breath. “Father Isaiah was the leader, priest, whatever you want to call him. I didn’t realize it until we got to Westhaven, but my father said I would be his. He had me first and last before he held my head in the baptism basin and said,Forgive her, Father, for she does not know what she does. Cleanse her soul and welcome her to eternal salvation,before he raped me again, only he held my head under water. I…I was dead. At least I think I was. After everything, I had Drew hovering over me, crying and begging. He saved my life.”
“Oh my God. I’m so sorry.”
She shrugged. “I know what it’s like to have your body used against you. To feel worthless. To feel like you are the reason it happened. It’s why I gave Blaize such a hard time for hurting you the way she did.”
I pressed my lips together, brushing my fingers over my almost healed wounds. “I’ve never been religious, but that is not what Jesus or God would want.”
“God is a scapegoat for them. They used it as a symbol to cause harm and deceit. It works. Years of manipulation. I survived, but I wasn’t the same person. I was in a bad place. I never left my room and Drew stayed with me, but I couldn’t have him touch me. My brother is my best friend, but it was hard. I left him a note the night I tried to kill myself. Father Isaiah found it and of course, he tried to take me once again. He found me in the bathtub after I cut my wrists. Isaiah pulled me out of the water so he could defile me again. He was asking God toforgive me for my sins while his fingers were inside me. When I was about to pass out, he beat the shit out of me and said how he would cleanse my soul. Before he had the chance to rape me again, Drew bashed his head in with something.”
“I’m so sorry, Hunter.”
She sighed, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Drew didn't react well. He killed them. He burned the place to the ground while they had Sunday service, and we escaped and came here. I think Isaiah escaped, but a lot of people died.”
“Is that what he means by his demons?”
She tilted her head from side to side. “Yes and no. His demon is the old me. He watched the life drain out of me as they raped me. Drew couldn’t save me even when he did. He saw the light leave my eyes. Drew couldn’t save me from my father’s wrath, he couldn’t save me from Father Isaiah, and he couldn’t save me from myself.”
“So what happened when you moved here?”
“Drew enrolled in school to finish out and he joined football to let out his anger. He was great at it. I dropped out and hit rock bottom. Drugs. Alcohol. Sex. The way this town was, it was easy to find it at seventeen, but then it wasn’t enough and I started killing men. Blaize found me when I attempted to kill a pastor and got caught. She killed him for me, and took me under her wing.”
“I’m sorry, Hunter.”
She shrugged her shoulders. “I turned my trauma into kink after I met Blaize, and we opened the X-rated portion of Hades.”
“How?”
She arched her brow. “That’s something you should talk to Blaize about. I’m not your domme.”
“Well, what do you like?”
“I’m a sadist, Kadence.” I furrowed my brows. “I like inflicting pain on my submissive, and not the normal run of themill spanking. I enjoy sexual torture with consent, of course. Intense bondage, wax play, CNC, knife play, etc. Anything that makes my submissive hurt. I like to hurt them, but I reward them for behaving with orgasms and praise. And then I like to share if I don’t have a submissive to myself.”
