Page 44 of Mended Souls
They knew before I knew about my feelings for Kadence. That fiery woman was like an inferno—intense, strong, and gorgeous. Her pull was inevitable, and my heart was done. Someone was trying to use her to send a message, but I wouldn’t let any part of my life hurt her. I already did enough of that. This relationship was new. It felt odd dating again, but it also felt natural with Kadence; like she was meant to fix the gaping hole in my chest with love and reassurance.
Everyone wanted answers, and I had nothing for them. I needed to find answers to give Sin and Ranger closure. They had to mourn the loss of their girl, the Reapers had to mourn a joyful soul gone, and my girls lost a friend who would do anything for them. Kadence’s first friend in Westhaven was Layla. Layla helped her when Kadence had nightmares. She was there for her.
Layla deserved justice. She would have justice.
Nothing would bring her back and I couldn’t ease the heartache my men are feeling, but I could give her peace. Once I found her killer, I would make them suffer. They took an angel who walked the Earth, and I would give her killer hell. They would regret taking a precious soul from us.
Uncertainty was gnawing at my core, making my bones ache. I needed answers, I needed to know who was trying to destroy my foundation and who was jeopardizing everything I’d built—all in the name of the man who stole everything from me. This anguish was a familiar feeling because it was almost exactly how I felt after losing my family, just without the gut-wrenching heartbreak and brain numbness. This was a personal vendetta to destroy everything I fixed. I would make sure this person had a fate worse than death. An easy death would be merciful, so I’d make them suffer.
CHAPTER 35
KADENCE
The somber sky reflected the atmosphere as heavy clouds hung low, and the air felt thick with grief. I ran soft, comforting circles over Blaize’s wrist as we listened to the priest’s final eulogy. The entire motorcycle club and everyone from Hades was here, solemnity written across their faces as we said our final goodbyes. I kept my eyes on the mahogany casket draped with an assortment of bright, colorful flowers, adding a bit of cheer to the muted tones of black, grey, and leather attire. Layla was always cheery and bright; even in death she needed to be remembered for the joy she brought.
Blaize was teetering on the edge and pushing me away in the process. She was trying, I’d give her that, but she wasn’t opening up to me or letting me in. I wanted her to fall into me and completely shatter instead of tiptoeing around her emotions. I wasn’t the epitome of talking about my feelings, but if this was going to work, I wanted to be the one she came to instead of bottling it up inside and not talking to me. Resting my head on her arm, I gently ran little hearts over her pulse, reassuring her that I was here, but she was shaking with anger and grief as she watched the funeral and everyone else with intense eyes.
We all stood as the priest recited,“We therefore commit this body to the ground, earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life.” A girl with long, blonde hair walked to the casket, placing her hand on it before looking in Blaize’s direction. The glare she gave her could cut through stone. The woman stepped away, watching as they lowered it to the ground. Then a man, a couple years older, walked up behind her and did the same, resting his hand on her upper back. He also looked at Blaize, but his features were more neutral than the girl’s—softer and understanding.
I hated funerals, ever since we buried Nathan. But Blaize needed me by her side today. At Nathan’s funeral, I was the elephant in the room, even at six-years-old. My parents weren’t the only ones to blame me for my brother's death—aunts, uncles, both of my grandparents, and countless others did, too. When my grandmother died when I was eleven, I still got dirty looks.
The girl shot Blaize one final demeaning look as she turned on her heel and stormed off, leaving the man alone. I felt her ease as the tension left her body. Hunter looked towards us as the man walked in our direction.
“Do we have any leads?” Blaize snapped at Hunter.
“Nothing. Whoever did this is a professional. I don’t know?—”
“Find out!” Blaize barked, causing me to jump and let go of her hand. She was angry and started to lash out, but it may also be a show because Layla’s brother was walking towards us. “I don’t care what it takes, find the motherfucker who killed her before he touches anyone else.” Hunter nodded. She knew not to take it personally.
“It’s nice to see you again, Blaize.”
Blaize hugged the man. “You too, Zachary. I’m so sorry about Layla.”
He sighed. “I know it wasn't your fault, even if Ashtin thinks you're the devil. Lay loved it here. She loved you and those two guys. You were her family.”
“We won’t rest until we find the people who did this. You have my word, Zachary.”
He gave a tight smile. “I know, Blaize. Can we talk?”
Hunter grabbed my wrist, whispering in my ear, “Come on. Let’s leave them alone for a minute.” I nodded, following her to her Jeep. I peeked over my shoulder, seeing Blaize and Zachary embracing each other. Blaize was comforting him as he cried, allowing her shields to fall to offer some vulnerability to him. My heart tugged, wishing she’d break down like that for me, but I refused to linger on the thought. I’d talk with her later tonight and try to get her to communicate with me.
I sank into the passenger seat of Hunter’s Jeep, attempting to hold back my tears but failing miserably as I angrily wiped at the wet streaks rolling down my cheeks. Hunter grabbed my other hand, giving me a reassuring squeeze. I felt fucking useless. “I don’t know what to do.”
She sighed. “With Blaize, I don’t think there is anything you can do right now. She’s still grieving Layla’s loss and dealing with what she did to you, even if she’s too stubborn to admit it.”
“I feel selfish, Hunter. I know I’m not her first love and I won’t replace what she had, but I want her to trust me enough to at least confide in me when something is bothering her. She told me she’d burn the world for me, but she’s not opening up to me. I can see the turmoil inside her, but she’s acting like she’s fine. I want to be worthy of her love.”
“Kadence, you are worthy. Blaize loves you. That woman hasn’t acted like that in a while until you showed up here. You see the women she is surrounded by daily; not a single one of them interested Blaize like you did. There was a spark, a connection, and she didn’t understand it.” If she was referringto the very first time we met, she looked at me like I was filth at Roadhouse. “You say she won’t burn the world for you, but she will. She’ll destroy anyone who wants to hurt you. You set her soul ablaze.”
Blaize set my soul ablaze, too, igniting something inside me that danced with every heartbeat we shared. Even when she spent her days hating me—which I guess now it was just her hiding her emotions, but still. The way I felt about her was something I’d never felt with anyone else. Countless flings and dead-end relationships never made me feel like this. I didn’t believe in love at first sight. With Blaize, it was more lust at first sight than anything, but it slowly became more. When we had our first night together, I knew I was a goner.
For the first time in my life, I wanted someone to cherish me, a connection so strong the Earth shook, and every touch felt like a promise of forever. I deserved a love that would make the stars collide and the cosmos sing. That was the love I felt with Blaize, and I wanted to feel it until we left this Earth and became stars ourselves.
“How can I help her? Seeing her like this hurts.”
“Blaize expresses her emotions best through sex, but before you think you’ll strip and she’ll fuck you, she won’t,” Hunter explained. “She likes being in control, and right now, her control is being threatened. She’ll hurt you, break down your walls, and make you question a few things, but she will pleasure you immensely.”
My mind wandered to our first night together and how she still had energy after pulling sixteen orgasms from me. There was more she wanted to do, and I wanted to try more with the woman I loved. Would sex be what we needed, though?
