Page 98 of Don't Go
A nurse — not Dr. Reyes, a nurse with kind eyes and a clipboard — came to the door of the lounge and said her name. Sabrina was up before the nurse had finished saying it. She was halfway to the door before I'd let her go.
I followed her and walked her through the corridor to the cardiac unit's doors. The doors had a sign on them that said ONLY AUTHORIZED FAMILY ESCORT BEYOND THIS POINT. The nurse stopped at the doors.
Sabrina didn't stop.
She turned at the threshold and looked at me. She’d been crying for an hour.
"Stay, please," she requested.
"I'm not going anywhere," I assured her.
She nodded and went through the doors.
I went back to the lounge.
Mrs. Park was in the chair across from the couch. She had her phone in her hands. She was scrolling so her hands had something to do.
I sat down on the couch.
I couldn’t sit still. I managed ten minutes, stood up, then sat again.
Mrs. Park looked up at me once. "Beau."
"Yeah?"
"You aren't going to throw up, right?”
"No."
"Drink water." She handed me a bottle from her bag.
I drank it. The water was room temperature and tasted like the bottle.
I sat for a long time. I decided for an hour.
Then I wasn't deciding anymore. I'd already decided — on Sabrina's chest in the dark, in my office with my thumb hovering over Aldridge's name, in the car this morning, at my desk, again and again. I just hadn't made the call.
Sabrina was through the doors with a child whose body was making the decision for me.
Mrs. Park's phone rang.
She answered. It was her sister. She got up to take the call. She walked to the corner of the lounge, put her free hand over her other ear, and started to talk in a voice I couldn't understand.
It gave me the idea to make the call too, so I stood up, left the lounge, and went down the corridor.
I came out at the parking garage and pulled my phone out of my pocket.
I scrolled to Aldridge and called her.
It rang three times.
"Hello?"
"Aldridge. It is Beau Cross."
"Mr. Cross."
She said the name with recognition. She hadn't been expecting the call, but she had also, in the saying, not been entirely surprised.
