Page 88 of Elite Player
“I saw you look at it twice, and you seemed…annoyed or something.”
He tries to wave me off. “My mom.”
“Your mom?”
“I don’t really want to talk about it, okay?”
I refuse to move when he tugs on my hand. We promised we’d always be honest with each other, and I don’t like that he’s hiding whatever this is. That he always shuts down any conversations or questions about his family. If he doesn’t want to be open with me, then I don’t want to either.
Nico’s eyes search my face, maybe looking to see if I’ll give in, but I refuse.
“It’s complicated,” he says eventually, and I need air immediately.
I can’t help but assume the worst.
That this fairy tale is coming to an end.
It had to at some point.
I’ve been having such a wonderful time ignoring reality, I think I deluded myself into believing it was my real life and not some fantasy.
“And I don’t want to talk about it here,” Nico says close to my ear. “Outside, I’ll tell you.”
We say our goodbyes then Nico collects our coats and leads the way to the elevators. Outside, he takes my hand to guide me down the street, the freezing air immediately making me feel better, and I take my first deep breath in what feels like hours.
Christmas lights and decorations along the street twinkle and wave in the chilly breeze, and Nico wraps his arm around myshoulders. “I don’t think I can have this conversation sitting down, so…sorry.”
I swallow thickly. “It’s okay.”
“I’ve never told this to anyone before, and it’s…” He nervously pats at the beanie on his head. “It’s difficult to say.”
I hold my breath, having no idea what is about to come out of his mouth. “Is it about me?”
He shoots his gaze to me. “No. God, no. Jo, you’re perfect.” He stops in the middle of the sidewalk to hold my face in his gloved hands and kisses me. The tip of his nose is cold as he nudges mine, his lips cool against mine, and I can feel tension running through his limbs. Maybe from the temperature or from whatever it is that’s been bothering him. “Is that why you got overwhelmed upstairs?”
“Partly.”
He nods and keeps me close to his side as we keep walking. “Sorry I made you feel that way. None of this has anything to do with you.”
That somewhat calms my nerves, though I’m still a jumbled mess knowing he’s obviously been dealing with something heavy for a long time.
He doesn’t start talking until we’ve crossed the street. “I had a hard time with the campaign today. It brought up a lot of…history. Bad history.”
I bite into my lip, hoping and praying my instinct isn’t true.
“They had me say a few lines about how men need to speak out for women and keep other men in check, and it’s true. We do. We need to hold other men accountable, but also…” He licks his lips and blows out a breath that fogs in front of him. “Men have to not be afraid to speak up for ourselves, not be ashamed for speaking out, and…I guess I got upset because they didn’t touch on that at all, and it made me feel…humiliated all over again.”
My stomach swoops. “Have you ever experienced…?”
He nods once, almost like he doesn’t want to admit it, and Ithink I might throw up, but I swallow down the lump in my throat. “I’m not sure what to say besides I’m so sorry. I… Are you all right?”
He sniffs, wrinkles his nose like he’s hyping himself up for a game. “Yeah. I’m fine.”
“Don’t tell me you’re fine. You haven’t been fine all day, and it’s okay.”
He wipes the back of his hand over his nose and mouth like I’ve seen him do so many times before when he returns to the bench after a particularly difficult shift on the ice, but he hasn’t taken a hard hit. He’s been sexually assaulted.
“Can you tell me what happened?” I ask.
