Page 56 of Live Like There's No Tomorrow
She looked into his eyes and smiled. “What I like best is that you don’t need a new one. Now I’m here and we can call each other up and see each other anytime we like.”
He smiled back at her. “I hope that one day soon we won’t even need to call each other, I hope that all we’ll need to do is wake up and open our eyes, and we’ll be able to see each other.”
Charlotte nodded slowly. “I hope so too.”
“What’s stopping us?” He knew they’d said they were going to take things slowly, but he didn’t want to. “I want us to get on with the rest of our lives, Charlie.”
“So do I, Ben. I guess the only thing stopping us is an attempt to be sensible. How do we dive back in to where we were when we’re no longer the same people we were back then?”
He shrugged. “If anyone knows about sensible, it’s me. But seriously, what are we hoping to gain?”
“I think, to me, it’s mostly about avoiding a big mistake. I didn’t want us to jump straight back in, only to find out that it doesn’t work anymore.”
“So, it’s just about being cautious?”
She shook her head slowly. “Mostly, maybe. But you know me, I’m not motivated by avoiding negatives. Part of me is hoping that if we take our time, we will build a solid foundation and become unshakable.”
Ben smiled. “Just when I thought I was going to be able to tell you that you are being cautious for no reason, you come out with a stronger argument.”
She rolled her eyes. “Damn! I wish I hadn’t done that.”
Ben laughed with her. “I do think we need to take our time, but I don’t think we need to take forever either.”
“But what does that mean, Ben? What does that look like? Not forever could mean a week, a month, a year, or anything in between.”
Ben wanted it to mean nothing more than a day, nothing more than this afternoon. “What would you like it to mean?”
She shrugged. “I don’t know. I think we should take however long it takes, but at the same time I want us to hurry up about it. If this were a new relationship, how long would it take?”
“How long is a piece of string?” Ben asked with a smile. It was something Joe used to say to him when he was small. “I guess all we can do is go with our feelings.”
She nodded. “That and keep being honest with each other.”
“Well, if we’re being honest, there is something I need to ask you.”
“What’s that?”
He hesitated before he spoke, “I want you to forget about Angel. I need you to understand that nothing could happen between me and her. My focus is all on us.” He braced himself, ready for her to argue. She didn’t.
“I’ll be happy to forget about her. Honestly, it will be a relief. I just needed you to know that I’d understand. I’m not going to explain all my reasons again, I think I’ve gone on about it enough. I just needed you to know that if that was what you wanted, then I would want it for you.”
He smiled, feeling relieved and leaned across to put his arm around her shoulders. “It means a lot you know, that you feel that way.”
She turned and looked up into his eyes. “As long as you know I love you, that’s all that matters. Now, what do you say, shall we head up the lake and see how fast this thing can go?”
Ben laughed and opened the throttle. “Hold on tight, here we go.” As they skimmed across the surface of the lake, he felt as though the wind was blowing away all the doubts and fears. If the boat could just go fast enough, they’d be able to leave all the questions behind and sail into a new future.
It was late afternoon by the time they got back to the marina. Once he’d moored the boat, he offered her his hand and helped her up onto the jetty.
“That was so much fun,” said Charlotte with a big smile on her face. “It reminded me of all the time we used to spend on Michael’s boat when we were kids.”
“Yeah, it’s weird now, these days instead of taking all of us out, he takes his son Ethan and April’s son Marcus.” His heart sank when he saw the look on her face. He had a feeling he knew what she was thinking.
“She’d be the same age as Scott, you know.”
Ben nodded. “Oh, believe me, I know. I think about that every time I see Scotty, and I’ve seen him pretty much every day of his whole life.”
Charlotte took hold of his hand and squeezed it as they walked back up the jetty. She didn’t speak. And he was glad of that. There was nothing they could say.
