Page 30 of Secrets of the Void
"Because I assumed you would be frightened of me." Those dark eyes were intense as he stared into her gaze. "I thought you would not wish to see me again after all that happened."
"I'm a doll, remember? They made me for whatever purpose my master sees fit." Ellie grimaced as she felt the squid slide down her sternum into her stomach, finally free from her throat. "If you wish to hurt me, you can. The pod will fix almost any injury as long as I'm still alive."
"You shouldn't have to live like that. Not in fear. It was a mistake on my part, and one that should not be so easily forgiven." He stripped another slice from the squid and held it out to her. "Chew this time, Sisu."
"My name is Ellie." She took the squid and tried to imagine what chewing would feel like. She knew what teeth were for. She'd had them her entire life and yet never really used them. They were for chewing, mashing food. She did it in the simulation, so why couldn’t she do it here?
This time, she put the squid in her mouth and opened and closed her jaw. Easy enough, once she really started doing it. Her natural instincts seemed to kick in, and then when she swallowed, it was much easier for her to do so. It didn't hurt this time, and now it made sense why humans chewed.
She'd only been given nutrient packets her entire life. That was all. Liquid food meant she never had to chew, so this was an entirely new task for her, but one that was rather satisfying.
"I know your name," he replied, that deep rumbling voice filling the chamber. "Sisu is the name I give you."
She quite liked Ellie, but if he wanted to rename her, she supposed that was all right. Shrugging it off, she waited for him to continue slicing through the squid, piece by piece, until her belly was so full it felt like it was near to bursting.
Finally, she held up her hand to tell him to stop. "Thank you, Proteus, I am very full now."
"You should not thank me. It is I who should be paying penance for harming you. I will do my best to prove that you are safe with me, but perhaps you wish to be apart from me for a while yet. The plan can wait. The ocean is patient."
"No, I don't want to be the person who slows everything down." Ellie headed back over to the screens, gently brushing Pilot aside so she could pull up the drone footage. "We've found a way in, you see. A few channels that I could certainly fitthrough. I think even you could move through one of them, and then we could get into the Sanctuary as you have wished."
"You should be resting."
Never in her life had she felt anger. There had been a lot of disappointment, refusal to see the world as it truly was, and frustration at her master for not listening to her. But this rage that burned deep in her belly was as unfamiliar as it was enjoyable.
She spun around quickly, so she didn't slam her fist down on important equipment, but she knew her voice had a snap to it that made Proteus’s eyes widen.
"I am not fragile," she argued. "I have lived my life like this for many years. I have been a clone in a pod, living in stasis and growing only as my master saw fit. I have lived a life that is not an easy one. I have been beaten, broken, abused, and torn apart by scientists. My brain was once used for a study! They took the top of my head off and poked around in there, waiting to see what part of my body reacted, and I had to be awake for all of it to tell them if it hurt or not. I am not a fragile little creature who cannot be trusted to take care of herself. If I say I am healed, Proteus, then I am healed."
The silence that followed that declaration was deafening. Perhaps she'd revealed too much. Sometimes she did that, and people were uncomfortable.
But she wanted him to know the truth. She wanted him to understand that she wasn't going to let a little lost limb make her life anything other than what it had to be.
Ellie was built for a purpose. And right now, her purpose was to help them.
It was as if he could see into her soul. Proteus had an expression that said he knew exactly what she was thinking, and how she was struggling with what it meant to be human. He could see that she needed to do something with herself to keepbusy and to feel like there was a purpose for her to even be awake.
Perhaps he could even see that she needed to know she was being helpful. Otherwise she would end up back in that dream space within her pod. She feared going back to sleep and not knowing what was happening in the world.
Maybe that was why he agreed.
"All right," he said. "We will start our journey soon, then. But you will agree to do something for me first."
She swallowed, knowing that whatever he might want would be something difficult. "Anything you ask, I will make sure it is done."
"You will learn more about what it is to be human. Not through any book or screen, but through doing. You must learn how to walk through this world making your own choices, rather than waiting for someone to order you around."
"I don't know why that’s?—”
He interrupted her. "You will be speaking with other humans on my behalf. They must believe you are who you say you are. I do not know if they will take orders from a clone, nor do I believe they will be kind to you if they knew your origins. Someday, you will be my mouthpiece to your people, and I will not have their mistrust of you ruin this plan."
Ellie supposed that made sense. After all, if she was going to be working with her own people, she did need them to trust her.
But she wasn't entirely sure why he would be the one suggesting this plan. Shouldn't she be the one who thought about that?
Hesitantly, she asked, "How do you want me to do that while I'm stuck in here?"
"You won't be stuck in here for much longer." He took a deep breath, nostrils flaring as the bones in his body started to glow. "I will bring you through the sea. You will like it."
