Page 47 of XOXO, Summer
I stop and look back over my shoulder. I’m not worried about him walking in while I’m bathing. The suds hide enough. But catching me masturbating is a whole other story. Holding my breath, I listen.
Normally, my sisters sound like a stampede on thesewooden floors. I’m greeted with silence, which means they’re still out back.Good.
Closing my eyes again, my thoughts go back to the first time our eyes met, an intensity like I’ve never felt before washing through me to take notice. Rubbing slowly over my clit, I can still feel the spark from when we first touched. When I was leaving and peeked back over my shoulder, I was met with a promise and a dare, as if he were my savior and the forbidden.
I tease and circle, rub and touch?—
“Would you like company?”
My body flails as my legs slip out from under me when I hear his voice, the water splashing while I struggle to secure a hold of the sides of the tub. I catch myself, but not before the bubbles end up in my eyes and dissipate in the water. “Don’t look.”
“If it makes you feel better, I’ve seen a naked woman before.”
I swipe the suds from my eyes before they start burning. “It doesn’t, Daniel. Go.”
“Okay. Okay.” He walks away with heavy steps, and the door protests as it closes.
Turning on the faucet, I pour more bubble bath under the running water, letting it spread so the cooler water tempers the hot water I’ve been lying in. I pull off the mask, wad it up, and stick it to the edge.
I don’t know what he saw, but he’s the only thing that’s inspired me to feel anything sexual in an unhealthily long and dry stage of my life. I should be embarrassed for what I was doing to his memory, but I can’t seem to muster the energy. It felt too good to be ashamed. “Daniel?” I look back when the door cracks open, but it’s not enough to see him. “Don’t leave.”
“I’m here. What do you need?”
Gnawing on the inside of my cheek, I fear being rejected. I don’t need the blow to my ego right now. Or ever. But the question is loaded. He just doesn’t realize it yet.
Do I ask?
Should I?
What am I doing?Oh God.
I’ve lost all better judgment around him, and why? Because he has a great face, hands that I am desperate to feel cradle my body, and a soft side for me that apparently doesn’t exist for anyone else. He knows my situation on the drought scale. He understands how my type A personality fits into my neat-and-organized small-town life and accepts me for it. He even feeds it by whispering sweet nothings, like suggesting we make rules and follow them. I have the perfect guy asking how he can help me.
Please Lord, don’t let him reject me. “Can you help me with something?”
“What is it?” he asks through the one-inch opening of the door. “Do you need a towel?”
“No. I need . . .” I turn off the water again and sit back, covered in bubbles. Taking a breath, I ready myself for the worst, bracing the iron side of the claw-foot tub, and?—
“Are you okay, Summer?”
“I’m fine,” I reply, losing my nerve.Just do it.“Can you come in here?”
The door slowly creaks open with his finger still in the air from pushing it open. “How may I be of assistance?”
Lying back in the tub, I keep my eyes forward while he remains behind me. “Did you see anything?”
“Other than you bathing?”
I glance back, seeing him leaning against the door withhis arms crossed and admiring me like I’m prettier than any sunset, and ask, “Is that all?”
He smirks. “I saw you master-bathing.”
“Daniel!” The water splashes up the sides when I howl in laughter. “That’s such a bad joke.”
“Made you laugh, though.” His tone is as lighthearted as he makes me feel.
Happy.“I’ll give you that.” The earlier nerves rippling through me have disappeared, and I’m left with a smile and a desire to spend more time with him. Sexually and not sexually, but in that order. Do I cross the line from what this is—playful?—to more? We’ve kissed, so I know the attraction is mutual. I take a breath and try again. “I was . . .”
