Page 76 of Crowe
The meeting had been at eight. Four hours was a long time for a strategy session, and I’d spent most of those four hours not thinking about what that meant. It was hard to know there was a group of people a floor below, talking about you and making decisions about your life without you. Not that I wanted to be there. I didn’t because I knew two things. The first was that if I’d been there, everyone would’ve been too worried about me and my feelings to be honest. The second was that they could strategize all day, but my life was mine, and I would have thefinal say. I’d earned that the day I walked out of the basement on my own two feet.
Jackson came through the door, and the look on his face said it all.
“Tell me,” I said.
He sat down on the couch beside me and turned so he was facing me. “Corvane’s network has gone quiet since the Gala. Kat thinks they’re either standing down or moving assets. Either way, the threat is still active. Chance is building a case, but there’s no timeline,” he said, without preamble.
I nodded. I’d known most of that. “And the plan?”
“The plan is to give Chance the time he needs. Keep security where it is. Keep your life as normal as possible. You’re free to leave the building with someone; you’re not on lockdown. The workshop at Mars’s shop, things like that.” He held my gaze. “We’re not just sitting and waiting. We’re keeping tabs on him. He’s bound to slip up at some point.”
“And if he doesn’t?” We both knew this couldn’t go on indefinitely. I couldn’t live the rest of my life in the Three Bears headquarters. I had to have a job. A life.
He was quiet for a moment. “Our first priority is helping Chance get something that sticks. If that doesn’t work—” He paused, and something in the pause told me this was the part he’d beendeciding how to say. “Priority two is relocation. New identity, new city, deep enough cover that Corvane can’t find you.”
I looked at him.
“It’s a last resort. Not the first option,” he said quickly. “But it’s on the table, and you deserved to know that.”
I sat with it. Tried to hold it the way my therapist had taught me to hold scary thoughts with sharp edges—loosely, not so tight that they would cut.
New identity. New city.
“Everything I have,” I said. “Dr. Reyes. Julius and Mika.” I could feel the panic creeping in like a slow rolling fog threatening to swallow everything. “The life I’ve built since—” I stopped and took a breath. “I know it’s a last resort. I know. But—”
“Noah—”
“I finally have something real.” My voice came out quieter than I intended. “I finally have… you. This.” I motioned between us. “And you’re telling me there’s a version where I have to walk away from all of it. Start over. Again.” I clenched and unclenched my fists and stared at the coffee table in an attempt to fight back the fog. “I know it’s the last option. I just—”
“Noah.” His voice was different. I looked up.
He was watching me with an expression I’d seen building for weeks—in the kitchen in the mornings, out at the camp when we took walks down the trail, and on the dance floor at The Hargrove. It was the thing that had made me believe this was something real.
“I need you to hear something,” he said. “If it comes to that. If we’re forced to build you a new identity and move you somewhere safe, they’ll need to do the same for me.”
I stared at him.
“I’m not letting you go alone,” he said. “That’s not a possibility I’m willing to consider.” He held my gaze with a steadiness that told me that he’d thought this through, and there was no changing his mind. “I love you, Noah. That’s what I’m telling you. Whatever comes next, you don’t do it alone.”
The room was very quiet.
I’d spent my time since the basement preparing for so many things. For the slow difficult work of putting myself back together, and for the possibility of Corvane coming after me, but I hadn’t even remotely prepared for Jackson Crowe. For him telling me he loved me. I should have, though, because now that he’d said it, I realized I’d known it was true. He’d shown me in a hundred different ways every day, so I shouldn’t have been surprised. But yet, I still was.
“Jackson,” I said.
“I know the timing—”
“Stop talking.” My voice broke on the words, which was embarrassing, and I didn’t care. He froze and looked at me, and I took in a deep, steadying breath. “I love you, too. I have for a while. I just—” I stopped and shook my head. “You would leave? For me? You would leave everything. The camp, Three Bears.” I looked at him. “Wyatt.”
Something moved through his face at his brother’s name.
“Yes,” he said.
“Jackson—”
“He would understand,” he said. “He’d hate it, but he would understand.” His voice was even, but there was something underneath it that told me how much it cost him. “But it won’t come to that. I told you it’s the last option. Chance is good at his job, and Kat is even better. It won’t come to that.” He reached across and covered my hand with his. “But if it does, I go. That’s not a debate.”
I looked at our hands. At the bracelet on my wrist, the dark stone against my skin that Mika had said was for protection, it was pretty, but I knew where my real safety lay, and it was right here with this man, not because of some metaphysical magic, but because he loved me.
