Page 82 of The Love of My Afterlife
“My god.” He shakes his head.
“I know,” I say, my whole body sparkling.
Cooper leaves to go to the bathroom, and when he returns a few minutes later, I’m sitting on the sofa still trying to catch my breath, holding on to the blissful sensations that cloak my body, a lazy smile on my face. My phone buzzes from across the room with the sound of “Jump Around.”
“Love that song,” Cooper says as I hurry over to my bag, heart racing. I open the text.
Is this part of your game plan to kiss Jonah?
It shimmers and pops into nothing. I peer around. Is she watching me? I quickly dip into the bathroom and close the door behind me so Cooper can’t hear. “Did you just seethat?” I hiss into the air.
The phone sounds out again.
Ew, of course not. But I know a postcoital glow when I see one.
“Stop! Anyway. I’m not sure I should be listening to you anymore,” I whisper into the air. “I’m pretty sure Jonah is not my soulmate.”
Soulmates is no longer the point here, Delphie! Shouldn’t you be trying harder to save your own life?
I frown. I refuse to spend my last two days on Earth gambling that precious time on something that is almost certain to end in more humiliation, sadness, and awkwardness. I switch my phone off and return to the living room.
“Wanna shower?” Cooper asks, a wolfish grin on his face, holding out his hand for me to join him.
“Yes,” I say, slipping out of my dress. “Very much yes.”
I’m lying in Cooper’s bed, my head against his chest. He runs his forefinger up and down my arm. I sigh.
“What’s up?”
I turn onto my side to face him, propping my head on my hand. “When we were walking back from the station earlier, there was a group of people outside the pub. Singing ‘Happy Birthday’ to their friend.”
“I saw them.”
“I usually find the idea of parties and the like a full nightmare.”
“You do? Why?”
I blink. “Well…”Because no-one has ever thrown me a party, and I knew that no-one ever would throw me a party?“You know, all that performative jolliness. Yikes.”
“That’s a dark perspective on parties, Delphie.”
“Maybe I’m a dark-hearted person.”
“I see you. You’re not a dark-hearted person. God no. If your heart was a colour, it’d be yellow. The colour of a sunflower.”
I laugh. “That was so corny, Cooper. You sure you’re a writer?”
Cooper does a mock-wounded face. “I take it back. Your heart is hollow and grey like an old tin can.”
I laugh and sit up in the bed. “What I’m saying is that tonight I saw those people singing‘Happy Birthday,’and I got it. Those guests, friends, family, whatever. They were witnesses to that guy’s life. The fact that they were there to see him change age—some arbitrary occasion—it marked it. It meant that it was remembered. Thathewill be remembered. Even when he’s gone. Because he had, you know, witnesses.”
“I’m not sure I understand.”
I sigh again. “Mr. Yoon is fine, yes. But he’s old. And he might not be fine for much longer. For whatever reason he’s shut himself inside that flat for as long as I’ve known him—over twenty years. If he had died this morning, then who were his witnesses? Who would have been at his funeral? Me and you. And we don’t even really know him that well. And Jesus, soon I’ll be…”
“You’ll be what?”
I turn to Cooper. His dark-green eyes are twinkling and there’s a lazy half grin on his face. He actually seems to like me. Beyond the sex. I wonder once more how bothered he’d be if I was gone. Would he miss me? Surely not enough for me to halt all this for the next two days? I mean, maybe he’ll think about me for a week or so. But it wouldn’t be like when he lost Em—someone he actually knew and cared deeply about. I expect he’d get over me pretty quickly with the help of Lara and all the other women I’ve seen visiting him over the years.
