Page 85 of Big Sexy Love
‘Where willIstay?’
‘Withme!’
‘I can’t do that!’ I get a vision of waking up in the night to find Anders standing over me with a bottle of Olaplex and some high-end cuttingrazor.
‘It’s no problem!’ he drawls, as if my protest is out of politeness ratherthanfear.
‘And I can’t afford a flightback.Shit.’
‘I have air miles!’ Mrs Ramirez shouts out from her place in the front. ‘I have travelled all over the world. Now I am too old, I have so many air miles saved that I canlongeruse!’
‘Are you sure?’ I ask, leaning forward towards her seat in the front. ‘That’s too generous. I can’tpossibly!’
Mrs Ramirez waves away my protest. ‘What else am I gonna do with them? I go on a flight these days and my knee joint swells up to the size of a Santa Clausmelon!’
‘Thank you! Okay… well… what aboutmyjob?’
The Joans have been so good to me, but they’re not going to let me have time off indefinitely, after all, I am the best fish filleter in the GreaterManchesterarea.
‘Just call them up, ask them for somemoretime!’
‘But…’ I start. My mind is so used to coming up with potential problems and worries that it feels weird not to have one immediatelyathand.
Huh.
I take out my phone and call Taller Joan’smobile.
‘Hello Joan’sFreshFish.’
‘Joan, it’s Olive!’Isay.
‘Olive! It’s Olive,’ I hear her repeat, presumably to Tall Joan. ‘We miss you! We can’t wait to see you tomorrow and hear all about the Big Apple. Did you have a fabulous time? Did you meet anyoneinteresting?’
‘Well, that’s the thing… I’m kind of…stillhere.’
There’s silence on the other end for a moment. Shit. She’s mad. They’re going to fire me and hire someone else. Someone with the name Joan who will fit in way better than Ieverdid.
‘Ah…Is everything okay,Olive?’
‘Yes,’ I lie. ‘I just… would you be really mad if I took another four orfivedays?’
I expect Joan to at least fuss a little, to verbally try to figure out how they’ll manage, what cover they’ll have, how they will cope without me. But instead, to my great surprise, she answersimmediately.
‘Of course, love! Take as long as you want! If you need to stay longer,youcan!’
‘Well Birdie’s surgery is next Monday so I’ll definitely be backbythen.’
‘Great!’ Joan says brightly. ‘No worries at all,mylove.’
‘Are you sure? I mean… Won’t you strugglewithoutme?’
‘It must be costing you a fortune to call from Manhattan!’ Joan says, seeming to avoid my question. ‘Give us a bell when you get back,won’tyou?’
‘Okay… See you then, Iguess.’
‘Yes. Yes. Must go, there’s a customer.Byelove!’
Joan endsthecall.
