Page 116 of Big Sexy Love
‘I suppose.’ I wave him out oftheroom.
I sit down in the seat Alex just vacated and take Birdie’s hand, peering worriedly down at her face. She looks like she’sasleep.
‘Hey Birdie!’ I say brightly. ‘I’m back! I got your letter, you turd. Whatthehell?’
I wait for her to open her eyes and laugh. To ask me to get her some coffee, to tell me about Dr BJ’s arms, to make it all better. But she doesn’t. Please don’t let this be it. I have so much to tell her. So much to thankherfor.
‘Come on, Bird!’ I try. ‘Please?’ Part of me stupidly thinks that the sound of my voice will wake her up. Magically snap her outofit.
But, of course, itdoesn’t.
‘What did the doctors say?’ I ask Alex when he returns from the loo. ‘How did they know toringyou?”
Alex brushes his hair back from his chubby face, his eyes tired and sad. He sits down on another visitor chair opposite me. ‘Our house phone was listed as the contact number for you, her next of kin. It’s a good job they had it. There was no one else listed. When I got here the doctor told me that she’d had a heart attack and they’d had do an emergencyangioplasty.’
I shake my head. Poor Birdie. Poor, poorBirdie.
‘Why isn’t she waking up?’ I ask, the tears starting to fall. ‘I don’tunderstand.’
I press my hand to her cheek. It still feels warm. It still feelsalive.
‘They said physically, she seems absolutely fine. There’s no sign of infection, but she could have had a small stroke, maybe? They said that sometimes the stress of these events in the body can cause patients to take a little longer towakeup.’
‘So theydon’tknow.’
‘They don’t know,’ Alexconfirms.
‘Wake up, Birdie,’ I say, trying to sound upbeat. ‘Come on, you lazy ass!Wakeup!’
But she just liesthere.
* * *
The following morning,I wake up in Birdie’s hospital hoping to find her miraculously back to normal, hoping that last night wast a terrible dream, an after effect of almost drowning at the harbour. But no. She’s exactlythesame.
‘Wake up, dude,’ I say for the millionth time since I’ve been here. My eyes fill with fresh tears as I squeeze her hand. ‘You’re being really ignorant you know,’ Igrump.
Alex is still here, asleep on the chair opposite. He wakes up, his hair all messed up, his round face all crumpled and sleepy-looking.
‘You can go, if you want.’ I say to Alex. ‘Donna must be wondering where you’vegotto.’
Alex shrugs. ‘I’mleavingher.’
‘What?’ I yell in such a high-pitched voice that I check to see if it roused Birdie. It didn’t. ‘What?’ I repeat in a more reasonable tone ofvoice.
Alex sets his mouth into a grim line. ‘She’shorrible.’
‘I know!’ I nod fervently. ‘Wait… how doyouknow? Whathappened?’
‘It was like, without you at home, just hanging out with Donna alone, there was no buffer. And it just hit me… that I don’t actually like her all that muchanymore.’
I press a hand to mymouth.
Alex half smiles at myreaction.
‘I thought you were super into her!’Igasp.
He fiddles with the sleeve of his brown jumper. ‘I was at first. But… I wonder if I was just looking for some stability, something secure after Mum and Dad, you know… and Donna is verysteady.’
