Page 30 of Fallen to Thievery
What the hell is wrong with me?Clearly, I had some screws knocked loose.
His hand brushed down my hair as he said my name again, barely audible. A shiver rippled through me, and I clenched my eyes shut. I hoped he knew that it was just the cold.
He didn’t say anything after that, just held me tight. Grayson’s heartbeats were calm and slow and for some unclear reason, it calmed mine too. I soon fell asleep to the feel of his warm chest rising and falling, rising and falling against my cheek; the steady rhythm becoming my silent lullaby. I slept better than I had in weeks. I had no nightmares.
I only woke once during the night. Grayson had turned onto his back, and the cold was creeping back into my bones. I stared at him for a while, thinking of what I should do. He was fast asleep, his breathing even. His face was even more stunning asleep. I carefully moved closer to him, desperate for warmth. I didn’t want to wake him; let him witness I was pining after his warm body.
As my body touched his, he stirred, and I froze.
“Ava,” he mumbled. He turned and reached for me, pulling me into him and wrapping his arms around me. My stomach made flip-flops in fear, andto my surprise, delight. The way he held me was so intimate. He wrapped himself around me, like my body was his to hold. Was he still asleep? His breathing hadn’t changed; it was still deep and even.
Grayson held my head in his arm, his fingers tangled in my hair, pressing me into the cradle of his neck. His other arm held me tightly against him, while one leg had snaked in between mine. I waited to see if he would take it any further, but he didn’t. He was probably asleep, so I relaxed into it. It felt good. I couldn’t lie to myself; I liked the way his strong body held mine. Just a few hours ago, I was scared to death of his strength. It made me feel powerless, hopeless. I was definitely still scared of him, but now… His strength made me feel safe. It was a hell of a lot better to be protected by a killer, than being his target. And these hands on me, hadn’t hurt me, but had taken care of me. Grayson had saved me.
Iwokeupthenext morning, alone. I felt a bit dazed, trying to take in my surroundings. If it weren’t for the sleeping bags still zipped together, I would have thought it was a dream, a comforting yet frightening dream. I had the urge to find Grayson, just to be sure that it wasn’t in fact, my frail, frightened mind that had played tricks on me.
Ducking out of the tent, I found Grayson busy packing up the camping gear we had used the previous night. He looked me over briefly and simply asked, “Will you manage the hike back to the cabin?”
I could feel my face fall. It left me a bit cold. There was no warmth or sweetness in his voice like the previous night. He didn’t look at me like he did in the tent. He had barely looked at me at all. Whatever happened last night, it had all but vanished. And I wasn’t sure I could stomach the way he had treated me before. Not now. I couldn’t go back to that. But what even was that last night? It felt strange in the light of day.
Nonetheless, I considered what he had asked. I pressed my sore foot to the ground. It was definitely better than the previous night. I rolled my ankle around, bending my foot back and forth, testing its limits. Finally, I placed weight on it and felt the pain shoot up my leg, making me flinch. It was still in rough shape, but there was really no choice. We couldn’t stayhere forever. And another confrontation with Digger was unthinkable and we were not far enough away from him yet. Never did I want to see that face again. “I’ll do my best.”
Grayson came up to me then and held out a hairbrush. The corners of his full lips tucked up. My cheeks heated. Was it that bad? I snatched the brush from him and limped to the tree stump. The way I looked hadn’t crossed my mind in weeks. I hadn’t cared. The only way I had wanted to look was invisible.
I worked my way through the tangles. There were still little pieces of mud stuck to the strands, here and there.
Yuck.
I longed for a nice, hot shower. To wash the last few days away. Or the last few weeks.
By the time I was done getting myself ready and struggling to get my boot on my sore foot, Grayson had packed up the whole camp and left it as if we were never there. As if the strangeness of the previous night never happened. He had given me the hiking sticks that were in the hiking bag and watched me with an expression that might have been amusement as I hobbled around, trying to find the best way to walk with them.
Grayson carried both our bags and didn’t speak much as we walked. He was distant… or uninterested, I couldn’t tell. He did help me over fallen trees and slopes, but always stepped back immediately, like I had a virus he was afraid of catching.
Silently, I marvelled at his steady strides over the rough terrain. His body was the definition of strong and fit. I guess you had to be if you were livingon the dangerous side of life. There would always be something to run from.
“Why do you rob banks?” It was the first time either of us spoke. What had possessed me to ask it out loud? On the other hand, I could do with the distraction. My foot was killing me. I knew Grayson’s pace was slowed so I could keep up, but it was still too fast. And I had too much pride to let him know that.
“Why do you want to know?” he asked with a tone that insinuated I was nosy.
I bit my tongue at that. It was not the time or place to get snarky. Instead, I pulled up my shoulders. “Just wondering.”
He stopped and lifted my chin so that he could peer down into my soul; or that’s what it felt like. My heart skipped a beat. The night in the tent hadn’t been a hallucination after all.
“Do you expect some kind of sad story so you can humanise me? Excuse my actions?” He smiled down at me, but it wasn’t nice or sweet. “Well, there is no sappy story, Princess. I’m just a monster. One who takes whatever he wants.”
My hand reached to touch the right pocket of my pants. No, it wasn’t there. The photo was still in the pants I had on the previous day. I had forgotten about it. I had forgotten what he had done to that mom and her little girl.
“Why didn’t you kill me?” He had been very adamant that he would if I tried to escape again.
“Oh, don’t think it didn’t cross my mind. I wanted nothing more than to wring your pretty little neck when I woke up.” He let his hand drift down my neck, his thumb trailing down my throat. “I still might.”
I swallowed hard but held my ground. “Why didn’t you kill Digger?”
His eyes went cold. “Killing him with my fists? That would have let him off easy. No. When I kill him, it will be slow andunbearablypainful.”
Did he plan on going back? I didn’t like where this conversation was headed, so I kept quiet and diverted my eyes.
Grayson laughed humourlessly. “You shouldn’t ask questions you’re not prepared to hear the answers to, Princess.” He tucked my hair behind my ear before walking on.
