Page 14 of Hard To Fall
We reach the fence overlooking the emptying arena. A few stray cattle are roaming. The mountains stretch as far as the eye can see. The day is beginning to wind down, and my body is aching. There’s a storm brewing. I can feel it in the air, and my body is definitely feeling it.
“You ever think about stopping?” she asks.
“No.”
“Slowing down?”
“No.”
“Resting?”
“No.”
She looks at me. “Living?”
That question makes my heart race. Living is what I think I've been doing, but if I can’t do that…
“You don’t get it,” I say.
“Then explain it.”
“This place is all I know,” I snap. “The rodeo is me. The dirt, the bulls, the blood, the legacy. It’s not a job, Lily. It’s who I am.”
“And if it takes everything from you?” she asks quietly.
“Then it was worth it.”
I expect her to argue, but she doesn’t. She doesn’t lecture either, and she doesn’t even give me a bullshit sarcasticcomment back. She just steps closer and looks at me as if she knows exactly how I'm feeling.
“People say that right before they lose themselves,” she says softly.
“You always this intense?” I mutter.
“Only with men who are emotionally constipated.”
I snort. “Jesus.”
She smiles. “You walked into that one.”
Thankful for the interruption, I rub my knee without thinking, and she takes note.
“Does it hurt?” she asks.
“No.” She raises a brow, and I relent, “…a little.”
She steps closer, and instinctively, I tense. Not out of anything other than the fact that if she touched me, I think I could get used to it.
“Relax,” she says quietly. “I’m not going to break you.”
I mutter. “I don’t break easily.”
“You also don’t have to be unbreakable all the time,” she says.
“I do.”
“Why?”
“Because if I’m not, everything falls apart.”
