Page 41 of Loyal
“Oh and Farrah, I hope that one day you find a love like your mother and I have. I hope you find someone who loves you in the good times and bad. Despite all the bullshit and at the end of the day wants you and only you. I hope you always feel loved and adored in a relationship and never neglected and like you don’t matter. Because being loved by someone unconditionally is the greatest fucking feeling in the world. There are no wordsto describe it. It just sucks that you’re so hateful and mad at the world when honestly, your life has been pretty fucking easy, most things considered, that you can’t be happy for your mom. That you’re so jaded that you want to make her life miserable.”
“I…”
I talk over her. “It’s really fucked up that at the end of the day if this ends, which it probably will, it won’t be because Sami or I want to walk away from each other. It will be because of you. Because you’re a spoiled fucking brat at seventeen throwing a goddamn hissy fit. Your mom will walk away to try and smooth things over for you. YOU! Because that’s what mothers do. They sacrifice even if it means it kills them. I just fucking hope that I can make her so damn happy that when she’s old and gray, inevitably alone because she will be too afraid to upset you again and will refuse to date that it’s me she thinks of when she thinks about being happy. Because I know for sure it will be her I think of and no one else.”
With those parting words, I walk away to let her think about what I said.
I just fucking hope that it sinks in and she actually hears what I said.
As I walk toward the door, I have to stop myself from whimpering. My head is pounding and my feet ache after the crazy shift I had today. All I really want to do is walk over to Loyal’s place, lock myself in the bathroom, and use his tub. Then cuddle with him when I’m done.
But I can’t because Farrah is home, and the last thing she needs is ammunition to use against me.
Sighing, I let myself inside.
“Farrah, I’m home,” I call out.
“Cool,” she shouts back, making me roll my eyes.
I drop my bag next to the door and head down the hall. When I reach her room, I find her lying on her stomach, feet up, with a textbook in front of her on her bed.
“How was your day?” I ask as I lean against the door frame.
“Fine,” she mutters.
I feel the corner of my eye twitch thanks to her shortness, but I bite my tongue. I just don’t have it in me to go toe-to-toe with her today.
I try again. “Good. Do you have any requests for dinner? If not, I’m just going to make some spaghetti.”
“I’m not hungry.”
I take a deep breath as I push off the doorframe. “That’s fine. I’ll save you a plate in the microwave.”
Before she can say anything else, I head down the hall and take a quick shower and change before heading back to the kitchen. I grab the noodles and a new jar of sauce from the pantry and set them on the counter. Next I grab the thawed beef I set out this morning from the fridge and put it in a pan. Right as I turn on the burner, the doorbell rings.
Loyal.
Smiling, I shut the burner off and head to the door. “Hey,” I say as I open it.
Only I come up short when I see who’s on the other side.
“What are you doing here?” I ask.
“We need to talk,” Billy says coolly.
I rub my forehead and sigh. “Billy, I don’t know how many times I have to remind you. If you need to talk to me, you need to do it through the app. It’s not hard and is actually really user-friendly.”
“I’m not going to talk to my wife through some goddamn app,” he snaps.
“I’m your ex-wife, Billy. I don’t know how many times I have to say it for you to understand. Now talk to me through the app or don’t talk to me at all.” I go to close the door, but his hand slaps against it, holding it open.
“Look, I’ve done some digging into your boy toy. Did you know he has a past?” he says, changing the subject.
Anger instantly rushes through me.
The fucking audacity of this man.
“First off, who the hell do you think you are? That’s such a gross invasion of privacy that it’s not even funny. Second, everyone has a past Billy. It’s really not that shocking,” I grit out, trying to keep myself in check.
