Page 47 of Loyal
He smirks. “Good. I should probably get busy on that.”
After giving Sami another orgasm using my mouth and fingers, I settle in next to her. Her eyes are half closed now, her face peaceful.
I did that. I was able to take the tension that lined her face and erase it from existence.
I don’t know why, but it makes me want to puff out my chest. I want to roar from the mountaintops that she is my woman and no one else can have her.
It’s barbaric, but fuck if I don’t feel it.
We aren’t quite there yet. I hope we get there, but until things with her daughter are settled, everything is uncertain. I feel like I am living on borrowed time. One morning she can wake up and decide this was all a mistake. She could leave me, and as much as I would want to stop her, I’m not sure I would.
I don’t want to let her go, but I refuse to hold on so tight that she suffocates. She’s already been through that once with her ex. I won’t make her do it again with me.
I hold her to me, willing her to rest when she speaks softly.
“Billy mentioned some things about your past. We don’t have to talk about it. I know you had a past before me, and I don’t judge you for it, but I want you to know if you did ever want to talk about it, I’m here.”
I sigh. Of course the guy looked me up. I can’t even be mad at him. I would do the same thing if my ex and my child were around someone. I don’t think that’s necessarily why he did it, but still, man has some balls at least. I give him credit.
I just wish he wasn’t using my past to hurt Sami.
It’s not as if I didn’t look him up too. I know everything about the man. Even down to the woman he has been sleeping with.
Such a double standard, but the guy is a tool, so I’m not surprised.
“I won’t go into details. You don’t need all of that, but I grew up rough. I’ve told you that before. Well, I probably didn’t tell you that I did some things I’m not proud of. I’m talking stealing and lying. Running from the cops. I have a record for a reason. Some of the arrests were warranted. Others were not. Either way, I will never be the clean-cut guy. I will always be the tattooed biker.”
She turns my head as she looks up at me from her place on my chest. “I’m starting to really like my tattooed biker. I don’t care what you had to do to survive in the past.”
I swallow hard. “What about what I do to survive now?”
She frowns. “Tell me. I want to know.”
I nod. “You know I’m part of the Lotus MC. Do you know anything about them?”
“Rumor is that it’s an outlaw biker gang that is on the wrong side of the law. You aren’t like that, though. You are a good man.”
“The rumors…they aren’t all true, but many are based on the truth. We are outlaw bikers. We do things that aren’t exactly considered legal. We have a moral compass, though. We don’t hurt innocent people. We protect what is ours at all costs. We are a family. One that might color outside the lines at times, but we love fiercely,” I promise her.
“What laws do you break?” she asks.
Usually we wouldn’t tell our women this. We keep them in the dark as best we can, but Sami isn’t just any woman. If she needs to know the truth to make an informed decision, I’ll tell her.
“Mostly running product. Guns and drugs. Sometimes money. We don’t deliver it here in town. We try to keep it outside of the city as much as we can so the drugs being sold here have nothing to do with us. I know it sounds bad, but if we didn’t doit, someone else would. This is how we keep the club alive. How we keep our streets safe.”
She looks away for several minutes. I wait for her decision. She could tell me to leave. I would do so without hesitation because I respect her. Or she could accept who I am. Who my family is.
When she looks back, she looks conflicted.
“I won’t say I like it because I don’t. Especially knowing you are out there transporting this stuff. I assume that is where you were tonight?” When I nod, she continues. “I will worry about you. Still, it doesn’t change how I feel about you. I don’t think you are a bad man. I think sometimes life forces us to do things we wouldn’t normally do. Like lash out at our children.”
I cup her cheek. “Hey, let’s not go back there. If you want another orgasm, just ask. No need to stress yourself out for it.”
She snorts but smiles. It’s the result I was hoping for.
“I’ll try my best not to. I make no promises, though.”
I press a kiss to her forehead. “Listen, you seem on the fence. I don’t want you to make any decisions without seeing what life would be like. How about you join me at the club event on Friday? It’s at the clubhouse. If you like it and approve, we can plan to bring Farrah at a later date. It can get a bit rowdy, but it will be safe for you. You can meet some of the old ladies and see how things work,” I offer. “You will be able to meet my family. The ones chosen.”
