Page 58 of Merciless Wager
“Whose pussy is this?”
“Yours, Zarren.”
“And this ass?”
Thwack! Thwack! Thwack! Thwack!
“Yours, Zarren.Yours, goddamit,” she sobbed. “Always only yours, Zarren.”
My name slipped from her lips once more as I thrust into her a final time. As I came myself, I wrapped my hand around her throat and pulled her head up toward mine. She was trembling uncontrollably at this point.
I’d broken her.
I’d wrecked her.
Although I didn’t have tears rolling down my cheeks like she did, I still felt every ounce of her pain. Every godforsaken second of her anguish. I kissed along her salty skin from her chin to her jaw and finally to her ear.
“You're so fucking beautiful, Bellezza. So goddamnedMINE!"
Not even an hour later, I was downstairs awaiting the imminent arrival of my uncles. After I’d fucked Aurora, I’d taken her upstairs where she’d become nearly despondent on me. All the fantasies I’d harbored about breaking her had quickly turned into nightmares upon actually doing so.
On occasion, she would silently sob, and all I could do was hold her in my arms as each tremor not only tore something from her, but from me as well. I hadn’t been able to touch her enough, but I forced myself to do so anyway.
After, I dried her off and helped her into something comfortable enough to wear on the long flight across the Atlantic. My silence continued as I’d stood in the doorway watching her sitting with her back turned toward me and her knees up to her chin. I’d had no words to make her whole again.
I have none to make myself whole, either.
Eventually, I shook my head, then went downstairs to wait. Now, I knew they were minutes away from here. Cillian had called me the moment their flight had touched down, andKingston followed that up with a message announcing their location.
KING:
About two blocks away.
A’ight. We’re here.
At least I was in the flesh. In spirit, not so much. My thoughts were all over the place, but they were not on the pool table, upstairs in the hallway, or even anywhere else in this godforsaken penthouse.
They were in Russia, which was a place I’d only been once in my lifetime. They were with my Bellezza as she walked through the gardens holding the hands of a child that wasn’t ours... Then later, smiling across the table during dinner at a man who wasn’t me... And finally writhing underneath another and crying outhisname as she came. A name that wasn’t mine.
These thoughts seemed to replace every real one inside my head. I hadn’t ever been so far outside of my own mind since I was a young boy. The more torture training my great-grandfather delivered, the more I’d imagined an actual father, and what mine should’ve been had he been alive.
I’d imagined the things the two of us would’ve done together, and each test I passed would cause the pride on his face to grow as he would look down at me and tell me how proud he was of me... And how I was such a great son...
Then another lash would come. Sometimes, my head would be plunged back into the tub of water. And other times, I’d feel the fiery burn of hot pokers being pressed to my skin, and in places now covered by tattoos. No matter what I endured, those foolish fantasies would disappear as my current Hell remindedme of what was real. I hadn’t felt this desolate since those early years until now.
Only, I’d something to thrust me back into the here and now back then, but not right now. Not anymore. All I had now were those memories, along with ones of another stuffing her mouth with his cock, and my Bellezza choking on it as she had once done to mine.
Balling my hands into fists as more visions taunted me, I pounded them against my skull, managing to do nothing more than make my head throb. Despite my state of pure exhaustion, I knew what my future entailed, and it was nothing like the roses, sunshine, and orgasms that hers did. Once she was gone, I would return to that damned fight club, and I might never leave again.
The sound of the doorbell jolted me from my thoughts, and reluctantly, I walked to the door to open it. Kingston and Cillian stepped inside, and I could see Conor and Liam there, along with a few of their own trusted soldiers. When mine looked up at me, I shook my head in a silent command to stay outside.
They both sat down on the hallway bench as I closed the door between us. After, I turned to my uncles. I tried to school my emotions the best I could at the moment, but obviously not successfully, because King pursed his lips together and his eyes narrowed.
“You look like shit, Z,” Cillian said, perfectly describing my current state.
“It’s five in the morning, Cill,” I responded.
“Which is around midnight for the rest of us,” King added, and I simply shrugged.
