Page 16 of His Dad Will Do
Thank God. But that’s not a complete answer to my question. “When I ask you a question, boy, I expect a complete and truthful answer.” I finish washing the skillet and rest it in the drying rack. “If you haven’t had a Daddy before, what do you know about the lifestyle and how did you learn about it?”
Silas blushes a fetching pink and hides behind his coffee mug. “Um, porn, mostly.”
I snort. “Not the most accurate portrayal.”
Silas gives me a look. “I know that. I’ve also been to a kink club with my friend, Chloe.”
It’s been so long since I’ve been in the scene that I don’t bother asking which one. Whether I recognize the name of the club isn’t as important as what Silas experienced there. “And you saw some Daddies and boys there?”
Silas nods. “There were some boys dressed in onesies and sucking on pacifiers. I’m not into that kind of stuff. I just want…” he trails off, looking unsure again.
“Someone to take care of you?”
“Yeah,” he says. “I mean, I’m totally capable of taking care of myself.”
“Of course you are, baby.”
“I just want someone to take charge, you know?” He slides off the stool and brings his mug to the sink. “So I don’t have to…I dunno…deal with stuff.”
I dry my hands off, then pull Silas into my embrace. He leans his head against my shoulder and I kiss the top of it. His blond hair is silky under my lips. “There’s nothing wrong with that, baby boy. I like taking care of you.”
I hold him for a few moments, then kiss the top of his head again and let go.
“Here’s my suggestion, sweetheart. You let me be your Daddy for the rest of the weekend and we’ll see if that’s something we both like.” I’m confident I’ll love it, but I want to give Silas an out if he doesn’t.
Silas looks at me from under the fall of his bangs. “How would that be different from what we’re already doing?” There’s a cheeky smile lingering at the corners of his mouth and I can tell he’s already sinking into the role.
“You let Daddy make all the decisions the rest of the weekend. You’ll do as I say, whenever and however I say, and I’ll take care of everything.”
“Everything?”
I tuck his hair behind his ear and brush my thumb across his cheekbone. “I will never abuse your trust, baby boy. But that’s what this is about. You deciding to trust that I’ll take care of you and that all the decisions I make for you are for your benefit.”
“And if it turns out I don’t like it? You making all my decisions, I mean. I like the other stuff we’ve been doing.”
He winks at me and I smile down at him. “Then you tell me you don’t want to do it anymore and we stop. You’re the one with the power here, sweetheart. It’s yours to give or withhold as you wish.”
“But what about if I say I don’t want something but I really kind of do?”
“Kind of?” I raise an eyebrow at him.
Silas looks down and his cheeks pinken. “Sometimes I think I want something, but I’m not really sure if I’ll like it if I do it.”
“Are we talking about something specific?” I ask. I’ve already seen that Silas likes a little pain with his pleasure, and if he wants more pain than what I’ve been giving him so far, we can definitely negotiate that.
He shrugs and doesn’t meet my eyes. “Not really. I mean, there’s lots of stuff I’ve thought about, but Lance never wanted to try anything too weird or freaky.” He glances up at me and rests his hand on my chest. “Sorry.”
“What are you apologizing for?”
“Well, it’s weird talking about this stuff with you and also talking about Lance.”
Believe me, I know. I try to ignore the stab of guilt I feel that it’s my kid who’s hurt him—Lance is a grown man, if a deeply immature one, and I’m not responsible for his choices—and I wrap my arms around Silas and tuck his head into my chest.
“There’s nothing wrong with you, baby,” I say. Jesus, the insecurity of youth is so raw. I remember those days, when anything someone says to you makes you question everything about yourself. “You’re perfect the way you are, sweetheart. You and Lance just aren’t right for each other, that’s all.”
Understatement of the year. It’s almost inevitable that your first love hurts you deeply. Silas will see that eventually. He’ll get over Lance, like I got over the first boy who broke my heart, and he’ll find someone who loves him for himself.
Silas heaves a sigh against my chest, then lifts his head. “I don’t want to talk about Lance anymore. I don’t even want to think about him. Or about anything else. I think I want…” He looks up and meets my eyes squarely. “Yeah, no, I do want you to take charge, Daddy. Please.”
