Page 56 of Just Listen
He frowned. “I don’t like how you just framed that.”
“Framed what?”
“Your statement. Talking about what you’llletme do. I’m telling you now, that’ll never work with a nigga like me. And that’s really why I’m pushing the issue with this DNA test. This is more so to establish this legally. Because…I feel like she’s more than likely mine. We just need that in black and white, so that you won’t have this sense of entitlement. Any child of mine, I intend to help raise, and that’s regardless of how you might feel about me from time to time. So, I don’t like the wordlet.”
I had to laugh at his audacity, as I thought about what my mama had said earlier. I’d altered my whole life the minute I decided to open my mouth and tell him about Khari. Now, this nigga was talking like he was about to start throwing around his weight or some shit.
“Yeah, okay, sir. I hear you. Although you’re skipping right over the elephant in the room. You’re talking big shit, when you don’t even know how Paisley will react. Or if she’ll even accept my baby.”
“That really aint got nothing to do with you or the baby,” he claimed.
I squinted. “How you figure?”
“Because if she’s mine, then I’m gonna be there, regardless.”
“What if she asks you to choose?”
He licked his lips. “Then I’ll have to deal with that. Either way, it aint nothing for you to worry about.”
I shook my head. “She’s gonna be hurt like a muthafucka.”
He sighed. “Trust me, I know.” He seemed to think for a second. “Let me ask you this. If y’all are cool or whatever…why didn’t you just tell her about the baby?”
“Because I like her. She’s cool, and I don’t like the idea of my baby being something that can hurt her.”
“So, you was willing to not have a active baby’s daddy, just to spare her feelings?”
I sighed. “I wouldn’t quite say that. It’s probably more about me than anything. I side eye girls who have babies for men they’re not with. I laugh at the ones who have babies for men who are already in relationships. So, I didn’t want to be one of those girls. Plus…this might be controversial, but I honestly believe that most men love their kids according to how he feels about the mama. So, I’d hate for Khari to be the oops baby. In cases like that, even when the man accepts the child, he usually has a tighter bond with the kids that he goes on to have intentionally with the woman he loves.”
“I hear you,” he claimed. “You making a lot of sense, but this aint that.”
“How so?”
“Cause. You talking like I wasn’t feeling you. The last time I saw you…you was clearly already pregnant. And we both know that shit probably would be completely different right now, had you said something then.”
“Right. I didn’t know at the time, though.”
He squinted. “You sure about that?”
I bit the corner of my lip. “I was late by then…but was in denial. Still…I probably would’ve mentioned it…had your phone not rung, before you admitted that you was back with your girl.”
“But you was with that nigga,” he pointed out.
I smirked. “Yeah, somewhat.”
His eyes narrowed. “What that mean?”
I tucked my lips into my mouth. “It means…that I was half-ass invested, because…I was still stuck on that weekend with you.”
“No, bullshit?”
“Yep.” I nodded, feeling more vulnerable than I was comfortable with.
Sighing, he dragged a palm over his face. “This is finna be crazy. That’s all I know.”
“Crazy, huh?”
“Jaylah!” Tootie shouted, as she banged on the door. “Day is waiting to finish your hair. Everybody else is pretty much ready. The hell are you doing in there, girl?”
