Page 11 of Cops in Space
What was he being so mysterious about?“Ok, what’s so scary about your man parts?”
Uncle Zarek stared at me for a long moment, and an image formed in my head.
My eyes widened in horror as a snakelike penis with a frill of tentacles around the top slid out of a stomach slit.“Tentacles? Are you freakin’ kidding me? What is it with aliens and tentacles? Ewww.”
“The tentacles increase a female’s pleasure,”Uncle Zarek replied.
The tentacles vibrated wildly like some freaky sex toy.“Oh, hell, no. That is not going inside me. Ever.”
An exasperated frown formed on Uncle Zarek face. “You do not have a choice in the matter.”
“The hell I don’t.”
“Coletti warriors are masters of seduction. Kaelen will simply overcome your reluctance.”
I crossed my arms and said sweetly,“It’s obvious you’ve never dealt with a woman suffering from PMS before. When it’s that time of the month Earth girls are fearless and capable oftaking down an armed warrior without breaking a nail. We’re Attila the Hun in a dress.”
“Attila the Hun?
“A conqueror kinda like you.”
Uncle Zarek scowled when his communication bracelet beeped.“We will continue this discussion later. Captain Zan is becoming unruly.”He vanished
The bathroom door slid open.
Dad was sporting a blackeye. Kaelen had a busted lip and a nice bruise on his left cheek.
“So, are we all good now?”I refused to look at Kaelen’s slit.
They nodded.
I took Jaxor from Kaelen.“Just so you know, you arenotputting that thing in me.”
“What are you talking about?”Dad looked confused.
“Uncle Zarek just explained the anatomical differences between a human male and a Coletti warrior.”I flashed Dad the image of the tentacled penis.“Ewww. Just ewww.”
Dad started laughing.“I don’t have to worry about getting you a chastity belt.”
“Chastity belt?”Kaelen inquired.
Still laughing, Dad replied,“Think of it as a metal diaper to prevent sexual intercourse.”
Kaelen shook his head. “Humans have strange customs.”
“Don’t I know it.”Dad looked around.“Where is Zarek?”
“He left to deal with an irate Captain Zan.”
Kaelen cursed and teleported.
“Was Mom surprised that you didn’t have tentacles on your penis?” Call me curious.
Dad ran a gentle hand down the side of my face. “She was. Our relationship was built on love and trust. Your bond with Kaelen is unbreakable and some adjustments will need to be made.”
“You think?” I shuddered. “Ugh. Tentacles.”
“Do you love Jaxor any less because of his tentacles?”
