Page 27 of Don't Date Your Ex Best Friend
I couldn’t help it, a humorless chuckle escaped my lips.Ex-best friend?Right.Kiara’s lips pursed as Jake tried to ease the crackling heaviness between us.
“Oh, well, I will let you guys sort this out,” he said and bent down low to whisper something in her ear, kissing her temple.He offered me a smile before walking away and leaving the two of us alone in the middle of the crowded hall.
I glared at her and looked away.I wanted to be angry, but I wasn’t.Yes, I felt like throwing things around, but I didn’t.Kiara was getting married.My Bella—no, now Jake’s Bella, was getting married to him next month.
Does he call her Bella?What sweet name does he whisper to her when they are alone?Do her eyes light up with golden flecks in them?—
No.Stop it.
My anger flared away when her palm wrapped around mine, pulling me from my thoughts as she took me away from the crowd to the open balcony with a gorgeous scene of city lights.Cold breeze brushed my face, and I wanted to thank her for bringing me out here, because I knew I was about to lose my shit in there.Judging by the look on her face, she knew it too.After all these years, she still remembered.
We both stayed silent, watching each other.I could still feel the soft pressure of her hand holding mine, my palm tingling at the sensation, now feeling bereft without her.
I looked away first.Clenching my jaw, I said, “So, you are getting married?”
“I am sorry, Ethan.”
My eyes met hers, “What are you apologizing for?”
She took a deep breath, and I hated myself for noticing the way her chest rose and the top of her dress tightened around her golden skin.She is engaged, asshole.
“For a lot of things,” she sighed and went to lean on the marble edge.“I should have opened up to you about my anxiety ...about all of it.But I didn’t and left you like a coward.”I saw the bob in her throat as she gulped before adding softly, “I should have called you.Told you about the book.About Jake.Everything.”
I leaned beside her, watching her tuck her hair behind her ear because of the chilly wind.“Yes, you should have, Kiara, but I have come to an understanding as to why you did what you did.You ...you needed to get better on your own because you are stubborn and wouldn’t ask for help.How is it now?Does Jake know?”
Kiara looked at me, the corner of her lips twitching as she gave me a small smile.“Yes, some nights are better than the others, but therapy helps.Jake knows.”She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head, “I am terribly sorry, Ethan.I should have called you, talked to you, but I was scared.”
“Stop apologizing, Bella.You are in a better place and I can see that you are happy.”Happy with Jake.“Why were you scared?”I asked softly, not liking the sad frown etched on her face.
“Scared that you would be angry at me.Hate me.”
Fuck, I hated the way her voice wavered.Kiara Sharma was a lot of things, but a coward, she was not.
“I can never hate you, Kiara Sharma,” I said truthfully.“I was angry at you first, but then, just disappointed.”
She let out a weak chuckle and looked away.“God, I am a terrible person.”
“No.”I stepped closer, holding her hand and brushing my thumb on her knuckles, “You are not a terrible person.I forgave you a long time ago because I now know that you would have never told me about your anxieties and depression if we had stayed together.You would have bottled it up and let it eat you alive.In a way, I am happy that you left me, because it made you into who you are right now.I ...I am proud of you, Bella.”
Thousand times.I had imagined us meeting thousands of different times, each scenario different from the other, each word planned out to woo her, see her smile before I see the dimple I desperately missed and take her to see my moms and then kiss her.But never did I imaginethis.Seeing her here, with Jake as her fiancé.
“You’re proud of me?”She whispered those words as if she didn’t believe me.
I smiled.“Yes, I am.You published the book.”
“I did,” she whispered and blinked at me.“I watched you.I saw you during your swim trials and when you were selected for the Olympics.”My heartbeat increased when she squeezed my hand, a dimple forming in her left cheek as she grinned at me.“I am so proud of you, Ethan Kane.”
I don’t know why hearing those words from her lips brought the same warm feeling in my chest as when my moms said that to me.
I was surprised and relieved when she hugged me, wrapping her arms around my waist and burying her head in my chest just like old times.I smiled and pulled her closer, hugging her tight and enjoying her lingering scent, black vanilla and coconut.
Her voice was muffled when she said, “I missed you.”
She pulled back to look at me and I watched the tiny gold flecks in her warm brown eyes.I ran my hand through her hair and cupped her cheek, whispering, “I missed you too, Bella.”
Kiara held my palm, a small smile playing on her lips.I wanted to kiss her.I wanted to savor the feeling of her lips against mine and see if she remembered the times I would kiss her just because I missed her lips pressing against mine.But I couldn’t.I wouldn’t.She was engaged.We both had moved on.
Yeah, I was lying to myself.
