Page 80 of Forever Fighting
“I made everyone turn around and stripped down, then ran into the water, only to run back out two minutes later. I don’tthink I’ve ever been more afraid of anything than I was in that moment.”
“Considering there are great whites in that area, it was likely smart you ran back out.”
She shudders and comes over to me, her arms wrapping around my neck, and she pulls up onto her tiptoes to kiss the corner of my lips. My arms band around her, and my hands land on her ass over her tiny shorts. I give her a squeeze as I tilt my head and deepen the kiss. I’m starting to get scared and scared isn’t something I do well.
“You know, you could say no to a dare once in your life.”
She scrunches her nose. “I think I’d regret not doing it and taking the chance more than I would turning it down.”
“But now you’re married to me.”
“Now I’m married to you. Think of the millions of hearts that’ll break when they realize you’re officially off the market.”
She’s laughing, but I’m serious when I ask, “Am I? Off the market, that is?”
“At least until we get divorced.”
She’s still teasing, but it pisses me the fuck off. Regardless, I don’t press it.
I’m at the point where I won’t be able to go back. I won’t be able to let her go. I’ve had her and I get to hold her and kiss her and tease her and touch her and be inside of her. I want this forever and I don’t know how I’ll recover if I lose it. I can’t just be her friend anymore and that feeling fills me with dread because being her friend is the best part of who I am. She called me a good man, but the truth is, without her, I’m not sure I would be.
If she hadn’t been there after Nash died, I’m positive I would have gone down a very dark and different path. She’s held me firmly in the light. She’s made me want to be better. A man who deserves her even when I feel like I’ll never live up to that quest.
I lift her into my arms and kiss her harder. Until we’re both breathless and smiling and the wind hugs us together.
“Let’s go in the water.”
I stiffen. “Or not.”
She pulls back and meets my eyes, her body tangled around mine as I hold her up by her ass. “Just our feet.”
“Braelyn—” I cut myself off as I think about this. About what I was just saying about fear. “All right.”
Her eyes round. “For real?”
“For real.”
She wiggles out of my arms and takes my hand, instantly walking through the hot sand to the cool water. The moment it hits my feet, a shock rolls through me. Yes, it’s cold in comparison to the sand, but it’s more than that. It’s visceral. Like the first hit in a match, it awakens my senses and gets my blood thrumming. It’s fight or flight and I always choose the former and never the latter.
I pull my phone from my pocket and take a picture of my feet and send it to my parents like a little kid showing off a stick-figure art project. But I don’t care. They’ll know what this is for me. In the last six years, I’ve pulled away from them. Maybe it’s time I changed that. Maybe it’s okay to live again.
Two nights later,it’s Braelyn’s birthday. She spent the day doing sunrise yoga, getting a massage and a facial, and lounging by the ocean. Unfortunately, I had to work for most of it. One of the major produce vendors was here and that was how it went. Braelyn said she didn’t care. That she was happy to have the time and spent most of the morning chatting with friends and family.
Friends and family whom she didn’t tell that she was married.
I tried not to let it burn me. After all, she asked for this time here to simply be and explore where we could go. She’s not ready for the interrogation both of us would undoubtedly receive, and that’s fine.
Since she wouldn’t let me buy her a birthday gift, claiming that Vegas and the resort were already her gifts, I decided to do something special with her.
“Where are you taking me?” she asks, one hand gripping my forearm like I’m about to toss her blindfolded ass off a cliff, the other outstretched like if I don’t throw her off a cliff, I’m going to smash her into a wall.
“Are you always this annoying with surprises?”
“Yes. In fact, I officially don’t like surprises after walking in on my ex in flagrante delicto.”
I cough out a laugh. “You sound like my grandmother saying it that way.”
“Your grandmother is very wise. Oh! I just realized. Now that we’re married, Octavia is my grandmother too. Yay! That’s so cool.” She does a little happy skip in the air and claps her hands. “I’ve always wanted her as my grandmother. She’s the freaking best.”
